Dealing with Social Anxiety in College

College is usually described as a great time to meet people and experience new great things. Everyone would like their college experience to be the best version of those two particular things, however, it can be a bit more complicated than that. We all get nervous about school, new classes, new professors, and new faces, but for someone with social anxiety, it can be even more challenging to try and get the college experience we all strive for. 

I picked a college where absolutely nobody else from my high school was going to. Ideally, this was a great way to make new friends and branch out from those I knew I was in highschool. I knew that for my own comfort, I would’ve likely ended up staying close to people I had met before and wouldn’t have willingly branched out. However, most people go to a college that people from high school are also going to, and I would strongly encourage those with social anxiety like me to make friends at a bit of a slower pace than what others are doing. It can be even easier to meet friends through people you already know; it can help you establish your own little group of friends early. An important thing to remember is that the beginnings of the semester are when everyone is eager to make friends and will happily meet new people. Push yourself to try and be friendly with those around you in class, and try to introduce or be introduced to people. It can be hard to try and make friends comfortably, but you should still be proud of putting yourself out there and introducing yourself to people. 

Something I found value in doing was telling my roommate that I have social anxiety. She had been rather social with many people already, and once I told her this, she apologized if she had put me in any situations where I wasn’t comfortable and asked what particular situations were the hardest for me. Through her, she helped introduce me to many people, those who would later become part of our group of friends. Meeting people already through her gave me enough confidence to try and introduce myself and talk to other people by myself. I met super nice people, and even if I didn’t make as many friends as my roommate, I was still proud of myself for what I accomplished on my own and felt happy with everyone I met both through my roommate and by myself. 

(Photo by Priscilla Du Preez)

I had gone to therapy back home for my social anxiety and found that it really helped me understand it a lot better and what I could try to use it as a positive force rather than a negative force. If you have an option, I would recommend just trying to go to a campus-resource that could provide a form of therapy to see if it’s something you’d be interested in. If there is no on-campus resource, try discussing with your parents if you can on finding a place that you’re comfortable going to. It’s not going to bother your parents, and more often than not, they’ll be proud that you’re making sure you take care of yourself and your mental health. 

College is stressful, and for those with social anxiety, there’s an added difficulty on top of that. If you find that your social anxiety is affecting you negatively, try to talk to an on-campus resource or friend that you trust. Social anxiety doesn’t define you as a person and you are more than what it makes you feel. People are always happy to make friends, so whether it’s through friends or gaining confidence in yourself to talk to others by yourself, just try to find the first step to putting yourself out there.