The Pink Moon in Libra passed a few days ago. It was a peak time for identifying old cycles and releasing them to the universe. One of the things I figured out about myself during this time is that I am always hoping someone else will take care of me. I was really not happy to discover this, and it honestly felt hard to admit. I often take on a caregiver role for people in my life, and while I absolutely love nurturing the people I love, I have always secretly wished someone would do the same for me. I felt really sad admitting this to myself, but then I realized that if I am truly a reliable caregiver for others, I could easily do the same things for myself— I don’t have to wait for someone else to do it for me. With this in mind, I decided that I’m going to do something everyday to make myself feel loved. Here are some things that you can do for yourself too:
- Make yourself a flower arrangement. This week I picked up a few bouquets from Trader Joe’s and made the prettiest bundle. You can also pick wildflowers and do this for free. Everybody wants someone to buy them flowers, but it is such a pretty thing to do that for yourself.
- Take yourself on a date. This doesn’t have to be a fancy event. It can be something simple like picking up coffee or a snack and eating it by the bay. If you would set aside time for a partner or friend, you should replicate this for yourself!
- Learn how to regulate your own emotions. This is one of the most powerful things you can do for yourself. If you spend time wishing someone would check up on you, or you tend to find comfort in other people but not in yourself, this is life-changing. Whether it is through writing, breathing exercises, practicing mindfulness, or spending time outside, if you are able to provide a safe and nurturing space for yourself, you’ll no longer feel helpless if other people don’t support you in the way you need.
- Take time to observe your thoughts rather than identify with them. When something triggers you, it is so easy to let those feelings become a part of yourself. For example, if you don’t feel accepted, you might start to feel shameful about who you are. This can turn into the belief that you’re not good enough. If you separate yourself from these thoughts and just observe them, it becomes much easier to avoid this. You can contemplate what they reveal about you, acknowledge them, and allow them to sit with you, but when you are through, you have to let them go. This makes everything a learning opportunity and makes you feel so productive. In my experience, it has helped me avoid picking up so much baggage, and instead, I’ve created a safe learning space for myself.
I hope these ideas help you feel both physically and emotionally fulfilled. It is so easy to rely solely on other people for love, validation, or comfort. When you start providing all of these things for yourself, you create a sense of safety and stability that can never be taken away from you. It pays to brighten your own day!