Ever since middle school, I’ve struggled with varying degrees of acne. From small hormonal flare-ups to major cystic breakouts, it’s always been a major source of insecurity. It wasn’t until my freshman year of college, when my acne had reached its worst, that I finally decided to go on Accutane, an 8-month long medication. Looking back, I can confidently say it was the right choice for me as it improved my quality of life significantly. But even now, I still deal with scarring, breakouts, and stubborn pimples. Luckily, over the many many years, I’ve learned how to accept it and give myself grace by keeping these five things in mind:
1. People will give you unsolicited skin care advice… a lot
One of the hardest parts of having acne is the comments I’ve received about how to get rid of it. While most people who offer up advice have good intentions (many of them have been my friends and family), it can become tiring. The important thing to remember is that many people have also struggled with acne in some way and genuinely want to be helpful with their advice. If you’re open to receiving input, go for it! That being said, if you’re like me and the comments make you feel self-conscious, there is nothing wrong with politely requesting they stop or changing the subject.
2. Don’t let it take control of your life
Acne used to make me hesitant to be in public or in large groups. I was perpetually afraid of how I would be perceived to the point where sometimes it would be easier to just stay home. As I’ve gotten older, I’ve become a lot more comfortable with myself, especially my face. I’ve come to terms with how I look and I’m not as dependent on others’ perceptions as I used to be. While I still struggle with a lot of insecurity, it’s helped me to remember that acne is simply a part of growing up, and it shouldn’t deprive me of the things I want to do. That’s not to say it isn’t noticeable in a public setting, per #1 above. It just means that the negative and self-deprecating thoughts are just that: thoughts. In reality, I was my own worst critic.
3. Make-up is entirely optional
I’ve never been a big fan of make-up, so growing up, I always just let my face be. Despite my insecurities around acne, I felt even less confident in my make-up skills and never bothered to learn. However, there are a lot of people who have struggled with acne that really enjoy how makeup makes them feel. While make-up can be a source of confidence, it’s important to use it for the right reasons. Make-up shouldn’t be weaponized against your self-esteem, and it definitely shouldn’t leave you feeling insecure without it. Like a game of dress-up, it’s meant to be fun.
4. Do some research
When I first started getting acne, I had so many questions. I didn’t know what it was let alone why it was showing up and what I should do. There are a lot of aspects of growing up that can be confusing, but acne doesn’t have to be one of them. A quick Google search allowed me to learn a lot about not only what type of acne I had but how I could manage it. Once I was able to learn about my body, it became easier to come to terms with it and move forward.
5. Don’t panic!
Acne can feel intense, to put it mildly. From social perceptions to self-esteem, there are a lot of negative emotions that can easily spiral. I often found myself engaging in harmful self-talk that would make me feel worse and worse about myself every time I looked in the mirror. I learned much too late that those kinds of thoughts severely impacted the way I thought of myself. As a naturally anxious person, it took a long time for me to face my acne calmly without spiraling into negativity. But once I did, I was able to start gaining confidence.