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It is no new revelation that TCNJ has a relatively small campus. Although this often times provides a homey, tight knit feel for its students, it can also make it the stage for a number of unfortunately awkward encounters.
You might be thinking “I don’t need to worry about awkward encounters, I have more important things to worry about, like getting a job and finding my soul mate.” And to that I say god speed because awkward encounters are ruthless epidemics sweeping colleges everywhere. If you don’t act now, you’ll fall victim to them like so many before us.
We have all been there, where there is that person or people you would rather not brush shoulders with on campus. To help you all combat the deadly “awkward encounter”, I’ve taken the liberty of dividing into three basic steps how you should go about the situation. First, it’s the sighting, second, it’s the interaction and third, it’s the get-away.
The first step of an awkward encounter usually involves “the sighting”. When you first sight the person you will either have the “fight or flight response”. The fight response is to face the music. The flight response, however, is when you chose to rapidly contort your body so that you start walking in the complete opposite direction. I personally suggest the fight approach, because unless this person has plans to move to Mexico soon, you will most likely be seeing him/her around more than this one time.
Once you have sighted the person, the next stage is “the interaction”. First, you can do the casual head nod as the nonchalant approach. It says, “I don’t really care too much about you, but I’ll still acknowledge your presence.” The important thing to remember is that too slight of a nod may not be noticeable to the person, yet too much of a head nod might give the person the impression that you have a spastic neck. Find that happy medium and you are golden, Ponyboy.
If you are feeling especially daring that day, you could try a verbal acknowledgment. A quick “hey” would suffice just as long as you keep walking; it says you have more important business to tend to. The trick is to not make your face look overly happy because then the person might mistake your happiness for you actually being excited to see him/her. This might sound tré harsh, but let’s be honest, you aren’t happy to see someone that you deem as an awkward encounter.
Last is “the getaway”. The getaway is fundamental because if you don’t execute it just perfectly, things could potentially get very awkward – let me explain.
So after you either head nod or say “hey”, you must at all costs avoid hesitation while walking. If you so much as halt for half a second, you run the risk of making the person think you want to chat. Avoid the chat at all costs. Chats could lead to awkward questions like ones inquiring about your plans for that weekend. Because of this I encourage you to walk unfaltering and with purpose. Your walk needs to look like you are so intent on getting somewhere that the person would actually feel intrusive on your life if they tried to talk to you.
So, if you follow these three steps exactly as I have directed, there is a good 89.5% chance that you will successfully conquer the awkward encounter. And yes, that number is totally legitimate and is backed up by science, facts and a lot of pie charts. Good luck my fellow collegiettes, I wish you well!
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