How Do We Know?
By: MSM
What is it to be happy?
What is it to feel crappy?
How do we know
When one decision will grow
To be something so bad
And make us go crazily mad?
How does it feel
To know your choice is real,
And meant to be
For you or for me?
How do we know?
How do we know?
Yes, I finally got my single room, and yes, I was freaking happy. Finally, the thing I wanted most all summer was coming true. The thing I wanted ever since I started applying for college. It was finally in my grasp and finally in my reality. Then how could this tremendous luck turn into a misfortune? Well, stick around and you’ll discover how.
Back to my marvelous story. After getting that glorious email from the residence office, something sparked in not just my head, but my mom’s head. I kid you not, there was a whole section of my house dedicated to things I’d bring to college for my dorm. My mom already had some things for me when I was expected to be in a double. Imagine how much more she bought when she heard I would be in a single! The dedicated section grew and grew each week until move-in day…the day I officially became a roommate to myself (AHHH).
I remember all the long strides back and forth to my mom and dad’s car, all the luggage we had to haul over, and all the things we had to unpack (most of which I still haven’t used). After three hours and thirty minutes, my room was (kind of) complete and I was in awe. That day was my first day moving somewhere that didn’t involve my parents or my two annoying sisters. Unpacking all my stuff hit me like a bolt of lightning. It made me realize that I was, in fact, growing up. Silly little me was taking her first step into adulthood without even knowing if she was even ready for it.
After move-in, I had three more days in my childhood home before I officially was a permanent dorm resident. I spent those three days not only soaking up as much time as I could in my own bed, but taking the time to observe how different my house looked without all my crap in it. My clothes were half gone, my sheets taken off, and my belongings vanished. Also, the dedicated section of college things was no more, and the section started to look a little lonely. Though it was upsetting knowing that all my valuables that lived in my room since we bought my house were somewhere completely different and foreign, my room still looked like a hot, cluttered mess.
On the special day of my official status as a college student, I woke up from my bed and looked out the window. I saw the deck that was just built around our pool, the leaves scattered all over the grass being racked. I smiled at that moment, then took a deep breath and got out of my bed to get ready for what was going to come.
When we arrived at the campus, I settled in. It was time for me to say goodbye to my mom and dad. I’m not going to go into detail about the events that took place during the time of me saying goodbye to my parents, but all you need to know is it was difficult and there might have been some tears from my parents (and me). They watched me walk into the college world before driving away into the world of which I once used to be a part. I walked into the lobby of my residence hall, hopped in an elevator, and walked down the hallway to my dorm.Â
Yes, I finally got my own dorm room, and yes, I was so freaking happy about it— so why don’t I feel so happy about it now?Â
TO BE CONTINUED