2022 felt like probably the worst year I have lived through so far. It was my senior year of high school, and everything went completely wrong. I could take you through the emotional rollercoaster I experienced that year, but I will keep it short and simple. I went to a small school where I only had 15 people in my graduating class (the short graduation was the best part!), so the girls in my class were with me from elementary school to senior year.
I already knew that I had tension with most of them, but one had been my best friend for 14 years; we were friends from pre-K through half of senior year. Along with the stress of being a senior, I also ended up getting brutally stabbed in the back multiple times by these girls and my “best friend.” It felt like the whole world was against me because as a teenage girl that is your whole world. I let this situation bother me for a whole year. I was moping around everywhere, and all I wanted to do was lay in bed and cry.
One day, I finally snapped myself out of it. I saw this quote that said, “God removes people from your life because he heard conversations that you didn’t hear.” I don’t know what it was about that quote, but I really needed to hear it. I began to reflect on the past year and realized that, despite the pain and anger I went through, it was the biggest blessing in disguise. So, enough of the sappy story, let’s get into some lessons I learned that year!
kindness will always outdo bitterness
I wanted to hate these girls. They caused me so much sadness and pain, and I wanted revenge. I wanted them to feel what I felt. I soon realized that those feelings were no good. As bad as they made me feel, I should never wish any pain upon them. Instead, if I cross paths with them, I will say hi if they approach me, and that’s all. I no longer hate them; instead, I pray for them. I pray that they find kindness in their hearts, and I pray that they never make anyone feel the way they made me feel.
You can create beauty from pain
The pain you feel is only temporary. If it won’t matter in the next five years, then you shouldn’t spend over five minutes worrying about it. You can embrace the pain for a little bit, but you’ve got to get back up on your feet and grow from it. I had a completely different mindset after going through what I went through. The beauty comes from the self-care you give yourself for mental stability and the healthy mindset you acquire. Get up, take a relaxing bath, do your skincare, watch your favorite movie or show, and bake a tray of cookies. I had the biggest glow-up after my healing era!
You can still treasure the memories
I have so many great memories with these girls, and I wish we could still get together and talk about them. I wanted to forget all the memories and throw away all the fun little letters, but I kept everything. Our falling out doesn’t stop me from laughing at past funny moments or reading the letters I have from them. It helps me remember what I had and what I lost, and it reminds me of how far I’ve gotten in the past couple of years.
You’re not alone
I know that I am not the only one who has gone through this. Although I hate that girls have to go through this, it’s kind of comforting to know that I’m not the only one. I always make sure to be there for any girl who has been through this exact thing because I know how painful it is to feel like you’re alone. There are so many resources for anybody who lost themselves after repeatedly being mistreated. No matter how alone you feel, you’ll always have somebody who relates and that somebody might be your new friend.
what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger
Just like the Kelly Clarkson song says! It is so true. Every little word. Things may break you down, but you’ll get right back up even stronger. I can honestly say that I am so much stronger, especially mentally, after what I went through. You can shift your perspective on life, and you can grow tremendously from the pain and heartache. From this, you are learning and adapting to the real world because things like this happen in the real world. Adversity can build inner strength.
Just know that if you’ve been through this, you’re not alone. You are strong. You matter. You definitely don’t deserve this. It may not feel like it right now, but this pain is truly a blessing in disguise. This pain is temporary, and you will soon go back to being the happiest version of yourself. You can still go out and conquer the day!