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Gaining New Perspective Through a Breakup 

The opinions expressed in this article are the writer’s own and do not reflect the views of Her Campus.
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Temple chapter.

Going through heartbreak is never easy, especially when it is not on your own terms. It can feel like the world is ending or like you are losing a part of yourself.

This past Spring, I went through a breakup that I thought I would never get over. I remember one day, I sat down and listened to Taylor Swift’s newest album- The Tortured Poets Department– which I very frequently listened to during this time to cope with how I felt. In Taylor’s one song “Peter” she says that “Love’s never lost when perspective is earned.” These lyrics helped me change the way I felt about my breakup, and felt about myself afterwards. I learned that although this relationship was over, I was able to use the breakup to gain a new perspective after it and use it to create growth in myself. The heartbreak was hard, but I was able to come back from it even stronger. 

The Aftermath 

The first few days felt like they would never end. I laid in bed for the entire day and cried until I tired myself out. I was both physically and mentally drained and could not even imagine being able to return to my everyday life. However, like everyone told me- even though I did not want to believe them- time did begin to heal everything. I slowly worked my way towards getting back into my everyday life and finding small moments of happiness each week.

When I finally built up the courage to write about it, I started to journal about my days and keep track of how I was feeling. I was also incredibly lucky to be surrounded by friends and family who care about me deeply and were there to pick me up when I needed it. Although I was beginning to feel better as time went on, I still knew that I had to work through the heartbreak myself and reflect on the relationship to truly grow from the experience. 

Reflecting and Growing 

I began to be able to recognize the relationship for what it was. Of course, no one is ever perfect in a relationship and although it would have been easier to just place all the blame on someone else, I knew that doing that would not help me heal fully. I was aware that we had both messed up at different points and that, in the end, we just were not a good fit for each other- and it wasn’t going to work out. I took time to focus on my strengths as well as my weaknesses, and figure out what my all my nonnegotiable expectations would be for my next relationship.

I also spent a lot of time thinking about the parts of myself that I had let go of during that previous relationship. When I really looked at it for what it was, I could recognize that I lost myself at some point during it and was not the same, happy person I was before. I took this time as an opportunity to explore new areas of life and revisit old activities I once loved doing. I started to get back into some of the hobbies I had let go of before, like playing tennis, reading, journaling, and baking. I found ways to spend time with myself and still feel content.

Even in moments of sadness, I tried to look towards the future with a positive eye. I accepted that I was not feeling my best in the present moment while also remembering that I would not feel this way for the rest of my life. I learned a lot of valuable lessons through this heartbreak and was appreciative of the fact that I had new standards and expectations for myself and my future partner. Just like Taylor Swift said, I had gained a whole new perspective on love and relationships- with both myself and with others. 

Looking Towards the Future 

I spent my time being newly single getting to know myself better and making sure I was in touch with myself and my emotions. My mind and my body were the most important things to take care of in the weeks following my breakup. I motivated myself with constant reminders that all the work I was putting in right now was going to better my future. No matter how many moments I found myself randomly saddened by memories, I kept working towards building the future life that I saw for myself. The future may have looked different than I imagined when I was in this relationship, but that did not mean that it would look any less bright.

In the end I am grateful that my breakup turned me into the person I am today. Sometimes I obviously wish that I did not have to experience this feeling of loss, but I am glad that I was able to build myself back up into someone even better than I was before- and learn to experience new love again. 

Love and loss are a difficult but real part of life. With my heartbreak came new perspectives, and I will always be grateful for that. I am proud of the person I am today and am happy to have been able to use this experience to learn for myself. 

Hannah Geib

Temple '25

Hannah is a senior at Temple University majoring in Advertising and pursuing a minor in Public Relations. In her free time she enjoys reading, writing, and journaling.