When I was about twelve or thirteen, I began to really care about how I looked. By that I mean, I didn’t just want to be presentable, I wanted to be pretty. I wanted to be the one to walk into a room and have everyone stare at me and admire my beauty.
When I was little, I felt as if I was the most beautiful girl in the world. Then as I got older, I realized I was not, or at least not by societal standards. This took a big toll on me. I became obsessed with makeup and achieving the perfect face.
I craved compliments and was constantly searching for how to improve my looks. I knew I shouldn’t care and that inside beauty was all that mattered, but for some reason I truly desired to be seen as attractive and not average or “ugly”.
My freshman year of high school, I remember watching an experiment in which a woman attempted to collect donations while looking “unattractive”. She had no makeup on, unflattering clothes, and messy hair. She was pretty much invisible and did not get a significant amount of tips.
She walked in the same area again with her hair and makeup done and a more flattering outfit. There was a huge increase in the amount of donations she received. People were overall friendlier and more receiving to what she had to say. All she had changed was her physical appearance. Why did something as small as looks create such a big change for this woman?
Researchers call it the “halo effect”. Apparently, we as a society are more likely to associate good looking features with good qualities and unattractive features with bad ones. We quickly make assumptions about people solely based on their levels of attractiveness.
There was a study done in which a group of people were split in half. Both groups were presented crime stories and had to determine the appropriate amount of jail time the criminals should receive. They discovered that the more attractive people they selected as the criminals received less harsh sentences than those that were unattractive.
The mind-blowing part is that the stories read to each group were the same. The only reason the more attractive group got lesser sentences were because of the assumption they were more innocent due to the fact that they were good looking.
I brought these experiments up because I think they say a lot about society. I also think it may be the reason I find myself so obsessed over my appearance. Beauty seems to be something that can really benefit you in life.
It naturally draws people toward you and people are more likely to be kinder as well. I always wondered if life would be better for myself if I was seen as more attractive by societal standards. Society seems to place so much value on beauty so should I as well?
Maybe if I had longer hair, fuller lips, bigger eyes, and a slimmer face, people would be less likely to treat me harshly or in an unkind manner. Maybe if my skin was clearer I could get away with more. As long as I perfect my makeup, hair, and figure, I can have the perfect life.
These are the thoughts that run through my mind constantly. As long as other people see me as attractive, I genuinely believe I’ll have a better life. Being pretty is the key to having people like me. Such a crazy idea but there’s truth in it.
It’s been engrained in my mind that my beauty is all that matters because society only sees beauty. I don’t believe I’m vain by desiring to be pretty, I believe I’m trying to gain a better life for myself filled with constant opportunities and benefits. It’s simple then. Should I constantly chase beauty to obtain a good life? The answer is no.
While pretty privileges can make life easier, it teaches us to be superficial and value looks rather than soul. Sometimes I have to look within myself and discover how I can improve my inside rather than outside. Instead of how to gain a slimmer face, I should think how can I be kinder. How can I be more giving?
We need to stop focusing on outward beauty not only for the improvement of our soul, but to teach young children that they are worth more than their looks. Slowly but surely, I’m starting to place less significance on how I look and instead channel that energy into simply being a good person who can provide for others.