In a world where test scores, GPAs, and labels seem to weigh more than the person achieving them, I used this finals season to leave it all behind… and it worked! As a Filipina woman in STEM, college finals are usually the season I dread the most. I have always thought to myself, “how can a singular exam determine the value of my knowledge?” It isn’t just that, though. I go into finals every semester gnawing at my nails because, “if I’m not perfect, how do I know that I can get into my dream schools just based on merit?” Sadly, this is a common experience for many individuals going through finals. This semester, I was determined to break the cycle and walk away from my finals with my head held high.
I realigned my mindset and plans for this semester’s finals. Instead of worrying about getting the perfect score or maximizing my resume, I focused on what I had accomplished and what I knew. Throughout the semester, I kept a running to-do list; it ran for 9 pages. Before I began studying for finals, I looked at every single item that I completed.
I thought to myself, “how amazing it is that I completed 9 pages worth of tasks because I could!”
This boosted my confidence. Not just that, but I had already felt more prepared going into finals without even studying. These 9 pages proved that I put in the work to understand the information, and the knowledge was already in my brain.
I had done it once, and during finals, I was going to do it again.
As crazy as it sounds, I gave up on perfection! I’m a human. If you’re reading this, you’re human. The jobs and schools I’m applying for, their recruiters, and application reviewers are human. We all carry this impossible weight to become perfect. If there’s anything we all know about college finals, we want to secure that final grade we had pictured in our minds at the beginning of the semester. Short and sweetly put, I gave up on that picture-perfect grade because I knew it was putting unnecessary stress on me. This was the reason I succeeded. Immediately, the recognition that everyone around me was seeking the same thing I was and that, at some point, we would realize that we’re human and that perfection isn’t real was what released me from what was holding me back. I became more than my grades, my finals, and the labels I put on myself.
I finally saw myself for who I am, not what I am.
Now that finals season is over, and I’m on the road back home for the holidays, I am accomplished and relaxed. Finals are no longer something I dread but just another exam, and a step on my journey to achieve my goals.