Keeping Up with the Kardashians, The Real Housewives, and Selling Sunset: all these hit reality TV shows follow women chasing success while surrounded by their closest friends and family. Deemed “trash TV” by many, drama-filled shows such as these often claim to lead the way for female empowerment.
This is precisely the case with the recent Hulu series The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives. The show follows eight Mormon women: Taylor Frankie Paul, Demi Engemann, Jennifer Affleck, Jessi Ngatikaura, Layla Taylor, Mayci Neeley, Mikayla Mathews, and Whitney Leavitt. These wives and mothers construct what many call “#MomTok,” a collection of dance-based videos featuring the wives, created by Paul in 2020.
However, this tight-knit group was torn apart when news of Paul’s divorce due to “soft swinging” flooded the internet in 2022. Throughout this series, the group is distinctly split into “sinners” and “saints.” Nonetheless, the women are committed to ensuring “#MomTok” survives.
There has been a backlash towards the wives, particularly on the “poor image” they portray of the Mormon religion. Despite this, the group maintains that the show’s primary goal is to provide women with something they can relate to and feel empowered by.. As Neely told TIME, “Whether they’re Mormon and they think, ‘maybe I’m not enough to be in the church because I drink,’ hopefully people can relate to us and feel like they’re enough, they’re worthy, or maybe be inspired.”
So, what do women have to say about this? Deseret News Editor Sarah Jane Weaver strongly feels “the recent portrayals of the women in my faith do not come close to representing me or the millions of active, participating Latter-day Saint women I have met across the globe — including my three daughters who are all in their early 20s.” She stands by those who believe The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives is yet another misrepresentation of what it means to be a woman through trash television.
On the other hand, The New York Times Opinion Writer Jessica Grose argues, “I love garbage. So I was surprised to find that beneath the usual petty squabbles and plastic surgery recovery scenes, there is a much deeper theme of religious conflict.” She shares how she was reminded of many women who question their religion. Grose then notes that this show sheds light on a middle ground of young women who still hold Mormon values despite finding it “‘impossible’…to be a modern woman and follow all the rules.”
The internet will always find a way to praise or bash any reality TV that comes its way. So, whether chasing after success with empowerment or disgracing the name of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, these eight women have inspired meaningful discussion about what it means to be a modern woman.