Growing up, I never really had my own style. It was always reflections of everyone around me, just trying to hop on the newest trend before it went out of fashion.
Style and fashion are things very personal to every individual. They project traits of your personality and are one of the first things people learn about you when they meet you. I was so obsessed with the idea of fitting in that I never tried to create my own style. I was always dressing up as someone else; someone I wasn’t.
It’s embarrassing to write about now, but in Grade Eight and Grade Nine, I was determined to dress in a ‘punk rock,’ style. Maybe it had to do with my obsession with the band Five Seconds of Summer, but either way, I was determined to go full-out, even though I knew it wasn’t an accurate representation of me. I always asked my mother to buy me black skinny jeans, flannels, and monochrome converse. A lot of the girls my age had already hopped on this bandwagon and I was getting on rather late, so in my mind, I had a lot of catching up to do. This is just a small example of the power that my peers and society had over me. No one ever forced me to style myself this way, I was just so obsessed with the idea that I had to dress like everyone else in order to belong.
Heading into Grade Eleven, I ditched the punk rock phase and moved on to whatever was popular at the time. I can’t remember exactly what it was, but I just know that it wasn’t an accurate representation of who I was.
By Grade 12, I was just lost, fashion-wise. It doesn’t sound like a big deal, but trust me, not knowing what you look good in, or what makes you feel most confident really takes a toll on you mentally. I was always looking at the other girls my age, and looking at what they were wearing- imagining myself in the same clothes, thinking to myself that’s what I needed to wear to achieve top tier style, and make me my best.
Maybe once a week I wore an outfit I felt good in, simply because all the other days I would try to be stylish then just give up because I knew I wasn’t going to look like the other girls.
Body image is something that affects your fashion and what you wear. It shouldn’t, but sometimes you just can’t get rid of the thoughts. I remember being in the change room and trying to fit myself into a bodysuit or top that I knew wasn’t flattering, but it was what was in style, so I had to try, right? Wrong. All those times I went shopping and left with nothing because I was so discouraged, it was because I wasn’t shopping for me, I was shopping to achieve a style that didn’t even represent me in the slightest.
After following the styles of others for years, this past year I really discovered my own. Social media really helped me find my style because it opened my eyes to so many more clothing options, styles, and fashion statements.
After taking a step back and looking at myself in the mirror, I was finally able to see that the way I had been dressing was just my way of trying to please others, not me dressing for my own personality and body shape.
I realized that I actually don’t like wearing tight black skinny jeans. I like blue mom-jeans that are tight at the waist but loose at the bottom so they’re still comfortable to sit in. I realized that accessories are so important, especially when you don’t feel like your outfit is killing the game. A couple of rings or a necklace can take your outfit from a two to a 10. I realized that my outfit didn’t need to be a 10 all the time. No one was going to look at me and judge me for wearing sweatpants two days in a row.
Today, my style varies depending on my mood. When I have morning classes, my go-to outfit is probably black track pants and whatever sweater I can get my hands on without having to leave my bed.
When I don’t have to be up early and I actually have time to put together an outfit, my go-to outfit is a loose T-shirt with either a single-line design or a graphic patch on the top-left corner of my shirt, then tucked into either a pair of loose, blue denim jeans or either plaid or checkered pants.
My wardrobe has changed drastically over the years, but I am now at a place in my life where every single piece of clothing in my closet is 100 per cent me. Whether it’s my soft, fuzzy, pink sweater or my denim overall dress, I know I will feel confident in whatever I wear because I chose all these items myself, for myself.
My advice for those of you who have yet to discover your style or what makes you feel best, is to try everything. Go shopping in stores you’ve never been in, try on clothes that are weird or you wouldn’t normally wear, and get comfortable with yourself.
Everyone is different in terms of what they consider fashionable. Your idea of fashion may not be the same as your friends, but if everyone’s style was the same, that would just be bland and boring to look at.
Go on a fashion adventure and create your dream wardrobe. It may take some time but trust me, it’s so worth it.