Halloween Costumes for Procrastinators

I love Halloween, but its poor timing is a cruel mockery of university students. In the heart of mid-term season, late-October is when we’re drowning in assignments, short on money, and in urgent need of comic relief. So how do you shoulder this triad of despair without compromising Halloween festivities?

Treat yo self. Retreat from the studying marathon and go out on October 31st. In particular, adopt one of the following personas. Plus, there’s nothing more odious than someone showing up to a costume party sans-costume, so don’t be that guy. These ensembles are made with household objects that are within arm’s reach anyway. They’re creative and topical but most of all, they each take less than 10 minutes to throw together. Be sure to tag us or add #HCRyerson to flaunt your handiwork!

Arthur’s Fist

What you’ll need:

• Yellow knit sweater
• Jeans
• Optional: circular-framed glasses
• Optional: round ears

The onslaught of Arthur memes this summer has brought the ‘90s classic back in vogue. The clenched-fist variant is the funniest to me, probably by virtue of its simplicity. The original Tweet even reads, “so many emotions in one fist,” so the success of this costume is decided by your hand’s performance. Be sure to moisturize on the eve of Halloween.

Will Byers (in the Upside Down)

What you’ll need:

• Floral pillowcase
• Scissors
• Sharpie
• LED Christmas lights

Expect a lot of Eleven imposters this Halloween. To set yourself apart, you can be the Byers’ living room wall! Find an old pillowcase reminiscent of ‘80s wallpaper and cut a hole for your head and one for each arm. Next, scrawl the alphabet on one side. Slip on the pillowcase and twine the Christmas lights around you for the finishing touch. However, it’s paramount that you use LED and not incandescent bulbs! If you use glass lights you’re bound to shatter one and lodge a shard in your body. You don’t want your blood to entice the Demogorgon.

Sweet Jesus Ice-Cream

What you’ll need:

• Azure blue t-shirt
• Ice-cream cone
• Ice-cream (loads of it)

This costume is not so much a tribute to the desert parlor as it is an excuse to eat ungodly portions of ice-cream all day. Simply hold the cone to your chest to recreate the SJ Insta posts you were inundated with this summer. Get your friends to take Snaps and Instas of you, of course.

Music festival attendee

What you’ll need:

• Flower crown
• Sunglasses
• Loose blouse
• Bralette
• High-waisted shorts
• Metallic tattoos
• Anything with a fringe

Admittedly, the festival aesthetic has overstayed its welcome. But why not revive it for a final hurrah before it hibernates for the winter? Besides, if you went to Bestival, Osheaga, etc. you probably have these numbers in your closet already. For the crowning touch, play music on your phone and shamelessly dance around.

Shia “I am Not Famous Anymore” LeBeouf

What you’ll need:

• Paper bag
• Scissors
• Sharpie
• Suit

I know, LeBeouf’s satirical red-carpet look is a bit dated, but it’s just so easy to reproduce. Strictly speaking, you don’t even need the suit if you don’t have one. Hollering a muffled “JUST DO IT” beneath the bag is a viable substitution.

Drowzee

What you’ll need:

• Yellow shirt
• Brown pants
• Pillow
• Yellow construction paper
• Headband
• String
• Scissors
• Tape

Dwight Schrute

What you’ll need:

• Yellow button-up
• Brown blazer
• Brown tie
• Aviator eyeglasses

The stone-faced, irascible, overachieving salesman is not just easy to imitate but also universally funny. Don’t forget to middle-part your hair and use copious amounts of hair gel to hold it in place. More importantly, pepper your speech with the watchwords of Dwight Schrute: bears, beets, and Battlestar Galactica. Throw in a few “MICHAEL!”s for good measure.

Sim

What you’ll need:

• Green construction paper
• Headband
• Wire
• Hot glue

Subtlety is the chief selling point of this costume. Certainly, it requires a bit of elbow grease to make the Plumbob but hey, you can still wear your usual clothes! Here’s a tutorial for making the head piece. You can even mimic Simlish to make a convincing display.

Pepe the Frog

What you’ll need:

• Printer
• Cardboard
• Scissors
• Glue
• String or popsicle stick
• Blue shirt
• Green pants

Sad Pepe, Smug Pepe, Poo-poo Pepe – your options are limited only by what’s on the internet. Print out the desired version of the frog’s face and glue it on a sheet of cardboard. You can either tie a string on each side of the mask or hold it up with a popsicle stick. This meme’s longevity is largely due to its variety. With that said, add something unique to upgrade from a standard Pepe to a Rare Pepe.

Lastly, a word of caution: yes, Halloween’s a chance to revel in childish merriment again, but the caveat is that it’s really easy to have an offensive costume. Please don’t commit the cardinal sin of dress-up by appropriating a culture or ridiculing a social issue. Below is a simple flowchart (courtesy of MTV) to put your get-up to the test. Have fun this Halloween but be tasteful and considerate!

• costume ideas
• diy
• hacks
• halloween 2017
• halloween costumes
• last minute costumes
• lazy
• memes
• ryerson
• stranger things