Wherever the school, whoever the student, the incentive to fit in always remains high stakes. The compulsion to find your people, and a group that makes you feel a sense of belonging, is universal. The pressure already exists urging you to constantly be well-liked and well-received by your classmates, especially in a brand new environment. That is the case for the thousands of students who enter university knowing no one — myself included. So it’s natural to attempt to reinvent yourself in a way that can lead to making new friends.
My decision to pursue fashion was not a difficult one. But I think you can’t go through university without questioning your choices a few times. Freshman year was the first time I felt immersed in an authentic fashion environment, a place I’ve always dreamed of. After the beginning weeks of showing off the best of the wardrobe I brought with me, I got clued into the underlying rule that everyone else seemed to understand already which was only bother coming to class if you look your best. I attended lectures full of some of the most stylish people I have ever met. I couldn’t help but think, damn, I have to up my game.Â
My first year of university was spent in New York City—one of the fashion capitals of the world. And I was enrolled in (on the university spectrum) one of the fashion school capitals of the world. When applying, I had the fantasy of living out my Carrie-Bradshaw-esk lifestyle of looking cute in my Manolos while stunting down 5th Ave to get to my 9 a.m. lecture. Three things were wrong with that idea:
- The amount of garbage surrounding the streets outside my Union Square apartment would cause my satin kitten heels to turn to sludge.
- Just thinking about putting on heels at 9 a.m. sounds exhausting.
- The likelihood of me choosing to wake up super early to pick a cute outfit rather than sleeping in another two hours is slim (but was that expected of me?)
One of my courses in my first semester was an open studio class from 4 p.m. – 10 p.m. (usually a three-hour group critique, followed by another three hours of studio time). Keep in mind this is after an almost full day of other lectures, studying, and working. I would characterize this class’s dress code as “casual chic.” One day -I want to say in mid-November- I decided to wear a matching Aritzia sweat-set with my mini uggs and Uniqlo puffer vest. Cute but casual, right? Well, when I arrived at class, I was greeted with stares from my desk mates and some condescending “Oh! Don’t you look comfy” comments.Â
Further on in the year, the new “it” bag that was gaining popularity was the Balenciaga City or Motocross Bags. I knew my mom had a (now) vintage neon yellow Motocross model, which was absolutely stunning. After seeing multiple girls around campus carrying the bag, I begged her if I could “borrow” it for school for the remainder of the year! Because it was a PURSE, it literally held my laptop (with no case), and maybe my Metrocard and a lipgloss. No functionality whatsoever, but did it matter? Clearly not to me, as I got a flood of compliments the following day, all admiring how “amazing” I looked.
As I sit here in my fashion class and write this, I watch people walk in one by one. In the first two minutes, I’ve seen Louis Vuitton, Goyard, and Telfars galore, all in all, upwards of $5000 at least. Regardless of how cute or ugly you can consider a designer item to be, I don’t know if I’m the only one who wonders if possessing luxury items or looking expensive is necessary to be “in fashion”?
I would absolutely never shame or insult anyone who chooses to buy or wear their designer clothes or accessories to class (if so, I would be a hypocrite). I will always be a supporter of “if you got it, flaunt it.” What I think is important to keep in mind, especially when in fashion programs, is that experimentation in your clothing choices is part of the process. I honestly felt that comparing myself to others and trying to outdo everyone was just as exhausting as the piles of schoolwork I was getting.
What I don’t think I realized then was when you enter university, you suddenly enter the real world where it’s normal to meet a plethora of individuals from all different walks of life. I’m not going to be like everyone else, and if I’m being honest, a part of me regrets not expressing myself more. Maybe I could have “impressed” more people around me by just simply dressing FOR me. I think that should always be the goal when it comes to your style, at the end of the day, whether that means dressing in designer or thrifted clothes or being on or off the latest trend. Does it really matter if we are all in the same class trying to get good grades? Your image or “look” makes no impact on your capability to work hard and be successful academically.
In order to make a lasting impression in the fashion world today, you need to be original. That’s not to say you can’t be inspired by your peers or others around you—did I save up and buy a Marc Jacobs Tote Bag because I saw a girl on Pinterest style it cute? Absolutely. But, your “look” in fashion school shouldn’t be based on the judgment from others. It should be you! Legendary fashion icon Iris Apfel once said, “Fashion you can buy, but style you possess. The key to style is learning who you are, which takes years. It’s about self-expression and, above all, attitude.”
So don’t stress! By the time it’s exam season, no one is paying attention anyway! Plus, this is your chance in life to try new things. Pressure to conform should never outrank finding confidence in yourself (or in your clothes) because self-assurance is what is going to make you feel like this career path is something you can actually go after.