Having just had Thanksgiving vacation and with December break on its way, we’ve spent a lot of time back in our hometowns with our friends from high school. While we made the effort to meet up to exchange “I missed you’s!” and “how’s your semester going?” the real reason was so we could pass judgment on one another. I’m sure you’re sitting here pretending you would never do such a thing, but let’s get real…you judged them and they certainly were judging you. While this is not the first time you’ve passed judgment on your peers, it is probably the most significant. Meeting up with your high school friends during college is really just to compare,
compete and judge.
Those who aren’t having “the COLLEGE experience” are lying and saying they are. We know you’re lying, but we’ll refrain from calling you out on your bull$h!t; instead we’ll talk about you behind your back when you leave. We’ve seen the Facebook pictures or lack there of, but we’ll give you the satisfaction of thinking you’re living the dream. Those who are actually going crazy are doing one of two things – they’re talking about how great their time is or downplaying how much they’ve been whoring themselves out. Chances are we still know you’re lying. Again, we’ve seen the Facebook pictures of your basically topless adventures at The Boot or the keg stands in the backyard of the local frat house. Either way, you’re raging and we know it. Or not, and we still know it. When it comes down to it, high school reunions are really just about who has the highest alcohol tolerance, body mass index, or change of morals; no one really cares how your semester is actually going (unless you’re thinking of transferring and then we’ll still talk about you behind your back). Remember everyone, lie, lie, lie and deny, deny, deny. This is holiday reunions Ana Roll.
Do you want something Ana Roll? Leave me a comment below or send an email to alacher@tulane.edu with Ana Roll as the subject.