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Life

Covid Changed My Relationship With Food And Not For The Better

Rieley Tomkinson
Simi Bhangoo
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at U Alberta chapter.

Growing up and all the way up until a couple of months ago, I used to have a really good relationship with food and the way I viewed my body. I ate whatever I wanted, albeit most of it wasn’t healthy, but I never felt guilty about what I was putting into my body. I could have five pieces of pizza with a huge helping of chips and topped off with a big bowl of ice cream and not feel bad about all the food I just consumed. Now though all of that has changed with Covid and this new world we now live in. 

A couple of months ago I made the decision to start taking better care of myself. I had nothing else to do and started devoting my time to working out every day and eating healthier. Now don’t get me wrong, in no way is this a bad thing. In fact, I’m so grateful that I made this change because physically and in some aspects mentally I have never felt better. However, as I mentioned in the title, my mental state surrounding food has completely shifted. When I first started trying to live a healthier lifestyle I did it solely for the purpose of trying to lose weight and get in shape. Now I am blessed in the sense that I grew up playing sports, so I already am in a fair bit of shape and I am used to fitness, however over the last couple of years I definitely neglected my body and so I wanted to pick myself back up and try to make some healthier changes in my life. 

Focusing on only making these changes for how I looked felt great at first but then it completely altered my sense of self. I would get discouraged when I wouldn’t see changes immediately in my body and I would constantly compare myself to other fitness influencers online. Worst of all I fell into a pattern of treating food as the enemy and would beat myself up whenever I had something as small as a piece of chocolate. I would look at what other influencers would eat in a day and immediately feel guilty for not eating a salad or for having second helpings. My mindset around food became dangerous and I started to fall into a pattern of weighing myself after I ate, which is not healthy at all. This pattern would have only continued and got way worse if I didn’t reach out for help. 

Finally talking about these issues lifted a weight off my shoulders. I no longer felt like I was alone and my fears were vocalized. I am nowhere near back to where I was a couple of months ago when it comes to food and I honestly don’t know if I ever will be. This process will take time and it is a constant issue that I know I will deal with throughout my life. I know I am lucky because so many people suffer from severely disordered eating and other issues surrounding food but I wanted to vocalize my experience so others out there who have stories surrounding their own experience with food relationships know they’re not alone. 

 

Rieley Tomkinson

U Alberta '22

Rieley is a third year Elementary Education student at the University of Alberta. When she's not busy studying you can find her binging a new Netflix show, singing along to musicals, playing with her dog or curled up with a new book.
Simi Bhangoo

U Alberta '21

Simi is a senior at the University of Alberta studying Sociology and Religious Studies. She grew up in Houston Texas and lives by the saying “go big or go home”. She is currently Her Campus Ualberta's Editor in Chief and Campus Correspondent. School, volunteering, clubs, and work occupy most of her time. You can find her on Instagram at @simi.bhangoo.