Her Campus Logo Her Campus Logo
freestocks 9rHgOVRdrDM unsplash?width=719&height=464&fit=crop&auto=webp
freestocks 9rHgOVRdrDM unsplash?width=398&height=256&fit=crop&auto=webp
/ Unsplash

Why I Am More Focused on Finding Myself Than Finding a Boyfriend

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at U Conn chapter.

I have noticed that the older I get, the less I crave a relationship. I just have this feeling that I have not quite blossomed into the person I am supposed to be and I do not want a relationship to distract me from that. However, it’s the opposite for most of my friends. A lot of them desire being in a relationship and are constantly worried about finding someone. Or even worse, they are worried that they will never find anyone and they will forever live in their parents’ basement.

I don’t think I think about being in a relationship as often as my friends do. In fact, I don’t really think about being in a relationship at all.

I guess you could say I have become more of selfish thinker. Lately, all I think about is myself. A lot. I think about how I can be a better daughter, a better sister, and a better friend. I think about what is truly important to me in life. I think about how lucky I am to even be alive and experience this journey.

I think about how I can be less judgmental and more open minded. I think about how I can take a more level-headed approach to situations to make for a better outcome, and I most often think about how I can be a positive influence on those around me.

Sure, I see myself with a family of my own one day, but not until I am the best version of myself, and certainly not until I find someone who complements that version of me and encourages me to prosper.

When it is meant to happen, it will happen. I truly believe there is someone out there for everyone and when the time is right, those two people will cross paths.

But for me, I want to give as much to the world on my own as I can before I cross paths with whomever I am meant to spend the rest of my life with. I want to focus on me for the time being so that I do not get lost in someone else. I want to focus on finding my soul before I find my soulmate. 

I want to focus on being a good human being.

I want to focus on becoming a healthier person.

I want to focus on being authentic and optimistic.

I want to focus on accepting people’s differences and embracing my own.

I want to focus on not surrounding myself with toxic people.

I want to focus on complaining less and appreciating more.

Most importantly, I want to focus on the next chapter of my life as a capable, determined, independent woman with a future as bright as I allow it to be. I am young, smart, and motivated and I want to embrace every opportunity that opens up for me and give it 100%.

One day I know I will find that person who shares in my perspective on life but until then, it is all about me and how I can give a little positivity to this world and to those around me.

 

Cover Image Source