Your Guide to Dealing With F*ckboys

Fuckboys seem to be everywhere these days. They reel you in by coming off as a “nice” guy but their true identity soon gets revealed. The fuckboy world can be hard to navigate once you’re in too deep, so here’s a guide to help you through.

How to Spot a Fuckboy

1. He only texts you at 1:00 a.m.

If he only texts you late at night, he’s probably a fuckboy.

2. He doesn’t ask anything deeper than “wyd.”

If a guy really cared about you, he’d want to know everything about you. If the only question he ever asks is “wyd?” or “what’s up?”, he’s a fuckboy.

3. He always makes the conversation sexual.

This is probably one of the biggest warning signs. If he constantly asks for nudes and always brings up sex, RUN.

4. He has no respect for women.

A fuckboy will always treat you (and all other women) like an object rather than the beautiful and majestic human being that you are. Remember your worth.

5. He never wants to be seen with you in a public setting. 

If a guy only asks to Netflix and chill in his room, drop him. This also means he’s probably talking to other girls too, so you should all get together and plan to destroy him (like in John Tucker Must Die).

How to Deal with a Fuckboy

Luckily, the HC UConn writers are very experienced in the fuckboy department and have been kind enough to share their pro-tips for dealing with them. If the guy you’ve been texting exhibits any of the signs of listed above, here’s some advice on what to do:

1. Lose all contact.

“Ghost them before they ghost you.”

“Delete all dating apps.”

2. Use them, then lose them.

“If you spot a fuckboy at the bar trying to get with you, use them for the free drinks then peace out without them.”

“Spend all his points.”

3. Kill their ego.

“Try and shake their ego; i.e, ‘You seem like you think you’re really hot.’”

“I’ll purposely hit on one of their friends just to see their ego deflate.”

4. Beat them at their own game and get revenge.

“To deal with a fuckboy, you have to think like them; you have to be a fuckgirl.”

“Make a network of anti-fuckboy women and stick together to empower each other.”

5. Know your worth (AKA you’re better than they are).

“Fuckboys are so easy to find because they are so confident, but please always remember that there are so many guys who see you every day and think, “Damn she’s FINE”, but they’re respectful and nice so they don’t give you the negative attention. Wait for those guys.”

“To deal with a fuckboy, you need to realize that you are so much more. You are Beyoncé and Michelle Obama and Viola Davis and Sophia Bush with some Kim Kardashian confidence. You act like you are better than they are. You act like you’re a Hermes bag that he can never afford.”

“Act like Scott Disick; all fuckboys are peasants.”

“Always remember you’re a hot bowl of rice and you don’t need no side dish, especially if it’s in the form of a fuckboy.”

“Once you realize you can be satisfied by your own hands instead of the hands of a fuckboy, you will feel powerful.”

“Remember you are all queens and have the choice to deal with these fuckboys or not, and we absolutely do not have to deal with them.”

Hopefully this guide has given you a newfound understanding of the art of the fuckboy. Here’s to helping destroy the fuckboy population one bro at a time.

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