Don’t go for hot or horrifying or hilarious with your Halloween costume this year; go Hawkeye. These five characters you see in your everyday Hawkeye life make for perfect costumes that will get laughs out of everyone you see downtown.
1. Freshman
What to Wear: On Iowa T-shirt, lanyard, half-washed-off X on hand, Union Wristband attached with Scotch Tape
Lines to Really Sell It: “Where is the EPB?” “Can I charge it to my UBill?” “Wait, blue route or red route?” “Wanna do a group order for fakes?”
You can easily spot a freshman on campus and downtown; this recognition makes for a great costume. Be careful, though: if you’re too convincing, you might get hit with a “Who do you know here?” at the party.
2. Off-duty athlete
What to Wear: full Hawkeye apparel, Nike slides and mid-calf socks
Lines to Really Sell It: “Wait, where did I park my moped?” “Sorry, I’ll be busy with practice, so I can’t do my part of the group project.” “When are we going to the dining hall?”
If you’ve ever taken a business class, you’ve seen an off-duty athlete. Usually taking up two desks each in a herd in the back of the classroom, they are easily identified by full black-and-gold ensembles and the relaxed attitude of someone who won’t be stressing about financial aid. The off-duty athlete costume is comfy, casual and a relaxing departure from everyday, non-athletic you.
3. Religious protestor
What to wear: Repent T-shirt, khakis, sensible shoes, offensive signs
Lines to Really Sell It: Stand on a corner and yell literally whatever you want. Just make sure to throw in a “Jesus says…” every once in a while.
This costume toes the line between silly and fun and altogether terrifying. We love to gather around the religious protestors and heckle and debate, but it truly is scary that the protestor might actually believe what he is saying. Keep this costume kosher by staying away from the offensive lines and take this opportunity to spout all of your less controversial, yet still unpopular, opinions. “I hate Nutella!” “Morgan Freeman’s voice is irritating!” “Iowa State is the better school!”
4. Sunday morning in Iowa City
What to Wear: bare feet, going-out dress, face tattoo, wristbands
Lines to Really Sell It: “Is DP Dough open for brunch?” “Who had pink wristbands last night?” “Last night was lit. So what are we doing tonight?”
If you’ve ever been awake in Iowa City beore noon on Sunday, you’ve seen or been this costume. What separates this outfit from any other walk of shame outfit is the face tattoo: Saturdays are game days, and those tattoos are a mark of pride that won’t fade until they’re scrubbed off Monday morning before class.
5. Cambus driver
What to Wear: Cambus T-shirt, jeans
Lines to Really Sell It: “Move back.” “Move back.” “MOVE BACK.”
This costume requires a partner or a group. All of you must wear the same outfit. Make laps around the party, and every time you pass one another, wave. Not everyone will get the joke, but those who do may join you in your laps. Just make sure to decide who is blue route and who is red route.