You know exactly what a fuckboy is. Sometimes, he’s easy to identify. He’s that guy that talks to at least three of your friends, or the guy from high school you couldn’t help but have a little crush on. Urban Dictionary defines a fuckboy as follows:
How to spot a fuckboy:
– White Nike tube socks with his Adidas sandals
– He wants to play 20 questions (**do not play!** especially if there’s a “;)” involved)
– Relies on his mom but doesn’t respect women
– Looks like he just read one of Jaden Smith’s tweets in all of his selfies
– Can’t find the clitoris
Fuckboys come in all shapes and sizes and results may vary, but when he a fuckboy…he a fuckboy…and you will know.
– Timothy over here askin’ for nudes when all u did was say hello, so he’s a fuckboy
– Connor, who won’t calm down with his axe spray, tryna infect ya lungs cause he’s a fuckboy
– Colin, adding #420 to his bio when he smoked weed one time, cause he’s a fuckboy
– Gregory mad cause u didn’t blow him after the first date, so he’s a fuckboy
Pretty accurate, right? But what about when he’s not so easy to identify? What about when he’s disguised as an unsuspecting nice guy?
With the help of a few ladies (or 30), I have compiled a list to help you know if he’s a fuckboy.
- “Every friend group has that fuckboy that everyone likes because he’s your fuckboy. You just love him anyways.”
- “If he has earrings, he’s probably a fuckboy.”
- “If he follows or retweets the ‘meninist’ Twitter account.”
- “A fuckboy wears pastel colors every damn day.”
- “Many fuckboys have higher than thou attitudes with the belief that they shouldn’t have to work for their money, women or anything else. They’re the boys that think we’re lucky to have them.”
- “If he uses ‘bro,’ ‘bruh,’ or whatever the slang is at the time in every sentence.”
- “If he says ‘lit,’ ‘fam,’ or ‘suh dude’ like, EVER.”
- “When he dominates every conversation and doesn’t care to ask anything about you.”
- “Whenever there is any mention that they do something “feminine” i.e. use a purse, feel sad or wear a skirt as a joke, fuckboys fear for their fragile masculinity.”
- “Fuckboys say whatever the girl wants to hear, even if he doesn’t mean it.”
- “Generic white boys that are Vine and Twitter famous or wannabe rappers are definitely fuckboys.”
- “If they have no sense of reality, want to make everything a joke and need to be dominant in every situation.”
- “A fuckboy makes fun of other guys. He talks down about other lifestyles, their clothing and the activities they like to do. Even their friends.”
- “When they wear watches, which is totally fine, but you can tell a fuckboy by when he feels the need to acknowledge his watch to make sure we know they have an expensive item on their wrist, so they can feel cool and try to make us compliment them.”
- In response: “Yeah, when he can’t even read a clock if it’s not digital, he’s most likely a fuckboy.”
- “When you’re with him, and he’s talking about other girls.”
- “When he says ‘I would’ or something along those lines when he sees an attractive female.”
- “The amount of fuckboy in him is directly related to the amount of hair gel he uses.”
- “Any guy that booty calls.”
- “He gets pissed when you don’t hook up with him.”
- “If he ever tells you that he wasted his time because you didn’t hook up with him, he’s definitely a fuckboy.”
- “If he keeps his phone tilted away from you or screen down when you’re hanging out.”
- “If his Snapchat is in any of his social media bios.”
- “One thing fuckboys all have in common is their actions do not speak louder than words. They talk a big game, they tell you exactly what you want to hear and when you need to hear it, but they have absolutely zero actions that follow.”
- “They keep saying ‘We should hang,’ but when you make plans they say ‘I’m busy.’”
- “You can spot a fuckboy by the following quotes: ‘You got a snapchat?’ and ‘Why would I lie to you?’”
- “The 2 a.m. ‘come over’ text is a sure sign of a fuckboy.”
- “Anyone that ever mentions the words ‘friends with benefits.’”
- In response: “I’m not looking for something serious, but you’re really cool, and I like you.”
- “If he sends you half naked snaps… all the time.”
There you have it ladies. Consider this your guide to spotting a wild fuckboy. If you’re currently talking to or being led on by anyone who embodies at least two of these characteristics, steer clear. You can do much, much better.