The past: beautiful and nostalgic for some, dreadful and completely terrifying for so many others. For me, I’m not too sure. I think we all experience certain parts of both. It would be easy for me to sit here and tell you that you should be grateful for your past and those life experiences you lived through because they made and guided you to who and where you are.
But, it’s deeper than that. It can be way more complicated.
Maybe it is because of the liking of one individual, the constraints you once felt like you lived in, the feeling of being stuck in one place, or even the repetitive nature of growing up and seeing the same things. I’ve felt that… trust me. Maybe the past that haunts you are certain people that you can’t seem to really escape. They were completely toxic, or maybe not that severe, but they simply just didn’t help you become the best possible version of yourself. Somehow though, you can move away, go to college, try and cut all ties, but that person or that one heartbreaking aspect of your past manages to creep its way back into your world. It’s slow and hard to see at first, but they slither their way back into your life. And then, you are transported back as if you went into a time machine, back into the old you. A few steps forward feel like a million steps back.
But maybe it’s possible to grab that phone with the past calling and just hang up. Maybe, just maybe, if you have a strong enough mindset and willpower to change that part of yourself, you can do it. I know for me it has felt totally unattainable, but I think I came to realize that it was only me holding myself back.
We live in an age where even if you physically move away from your past, like hundreds of miles away, you can still be connected. Social media gives us that perfect little blessing! (And yes, that is meant to be sarcastic.) I always felt that I never could move on and look into my future because I was constantly reminded of what was behind me. I was constantly looking through my rear-view mirror called Instagram and Snapchat. So, I learned I had to do it myself. To hang up on the past that I was so scared of, I had to disconnect.
Now, I’m not saying I deleted all my social media, but when I felt particularly anxious or caught myself replaying the old thoughts I used to have about people or situations, I would take a break from everything online. Why did I need to be constantly reminded of my past through a phone screen when I was miles away? And I will tell you, it helped. If there is that person or place you don’t want to see anymore or just simply move on from, you have the power to do that. It can’t be done by someone else, only you.
I am a firm believer that anything you want to achieve is possible with a mindset that is determined to see change. Your past can be both completely haunting and also magnificent. I just recommend that if it is those scary parts of your past that led you to an unhealthy life and mindset, you should make a change. You can only look forward and move on steadily. So, if you hear that phone ring, just hang up. It is possible.
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