Even if you aren’t chronically online, you’ve probably heard the phrase “main character energy” thrown around. It encapsulates the feeling of being the protagonist in a movie.
Whether it’s a TikTok of someone sipping on an almond milk matcha latte while walking to pilates or an aesthetic Instagram reel of a fun night out, the pressure of romanticized individualism dawns upon Gen-Z. But beyond the carefully curated online moments, what does having main character energy really mean? Is too much of it healthy for you? And more importantly, how can you genuinely embody it in your everyday life?
The psychology behind main character energy
From a psychological standpoint, adopting main character energy aligns with principles of positive psychology, particularly concepts like personal agency, resilience, and self-worth. When you view yourself as the protagonist of your life, you’re more likely to make intentional choices that align with your goals and values.
The Spotlight Effect – Ever walked into a room and felt like everyone was staring at you? That’s the Spotlight Effect—a cognitive bias where we overestimate how much people notice us. The irony? No one is watching as closely as you think. Main character energy embraces this by shifting focus inward rather than worrying about external judgment.
Self-Perception Theory – Psychologists Daryl Bem’s Self-Perception Theory suggests that people develop attitudes by observing their own behaviors. If you act like the main character—by making decisions that reflect your desires, prioritizing yourself, and embracing new experiences—you will start to believe it on a deeper level.
Growth Mindset – Dr. Carol Dweck’s Growth Mindset research suggests that believing in your ability to change and improve is crucial for personal development. Main characters aren’t perfect—they evolve. When you embrace a growth mindset, you allow yourself to step into your power without fear of failure.
HOW TO EMBODY HEALTHY MAIN CHARACTER ENERGY
Like most things in life, moderation is key. It is important to understand the difference between self-obsession, and positive self-concept. Gratitude for your support system that may comprise family, friends, or teachers is crucial for a healthy relationship with yourself and others. Self-care ironically isn’t all about putting yourself on a pedestal, it’s indeed about taking care of yourself as well as the relationships in your life.
Another important aspect of “main character regulation” is understanding that individuality and having a positive self-outlook does not necessarily mean having a body that meets societal standards or booking the most expensive trip for spring break. Social comparison theory — the idea that people determine their own social and personal worth based on how they stack up against others, as explained in Psychology Today. The sheer amount of comparison emanated by social media is at an all-time high because of the accessibility we have to strangers all over the world. Having main character energy is an idea often propagated through social media, and so is false content. It’s easy to forget not everything we see online is true, however, “real” it may look “casually” buried in someone’s Instagram feed, and so we tend to internalize other people’s supposed best lives.
You’ve probably already heard of “romanticizing your life” so here are some other ways to cultivate authentic main character energy, without developing narcissistic tendencies, or worse, disregard every other character in your life:
Prioritize Your Passions – Main characters have interests. Whether it’s writing, music, science, or something niche like birdwatching—lean into what excites you. Taking up hobbies, even if you’re not “good” at them, builds self-identity and makes life feel more fulfilling.
2. Do it for the Plot – No great story happens when the protagonist stays in their comfort zone; confidence comes from experience, not just affirmation. Challenge yourself to try something new — sign up for that dance class, apply for that internship, or travel solo.
3. Build a Narrative You’re Proud Of – Think about the story you want to tell about your life, and keep asking these questions – Are you making choices that align with your dreams? Are you surrounding yourself with people who uplift you, and do you uplift them?
summing up
Main character energy isn’t about living a perfectly curated life or constantly being the center of attention — it’s about intentionally choosing yourself. It’s the confidence to walk into a room without slouching, the courage to chase what excites you, and the resilience to embrace change.
So go ahead — romanticize your walk to class, blast your favorite playlist, and start living like the protagonist of your own story — one that has positive character development. In a way it’s funny you need to be reminded of this, because you already are the main character of your life!
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