I was thinking about this recently when I was watching Gilmore Girls. Although I love this show, it is not what I imagined it to be in terms of the main character’s relationship with her mother. There are definitely times where their relationship is what I imagined the dynamic between a single mother and her daughter would be, and other times where it feels like it is being glamorized for the audience who may not relate. I understand TV shows do this in order to capture the general audience and create an enjoyable show for everyone; however, I’m going to talk about the actual reality of this duo, and that it is not as fabulous as it seems.
The duo relationship in the media
Before I get into my reflection, I’m going to explain some ways that the media glamorizes this relationship. For instance, I noticed that shows that mainly focus on a single mother and daughter make them have this best friend or sister-like behavior with one another. This is usually because the mother had the daughter very young, and they’re closer together in age. This creates a wholesome family atmosphere in the show, and makes the audience feel they have something to root for. I also noticed that sometimes television shows do not show the struggles that come with being a single parent. For example, the struggles of paying the bills on time, working extra shifts, trying to be in their kids’ lives while supporting them by themselves, and the struggle of finding time for their own self care and alone time. I feel like it is implied or shown in subtle ways, but it is not as big of a focus. I mention this because I feel that not showing this aspect that is common for single parents is that it makes the relationship with their child seem “easy.” In a way, it seems there’s no barriers or conflict, and that everything is magically taken care of. Those are the two big things I’ve seen in television shows about single mothers and their daughter.
The Reality
The plot of the single mother and daughter being best friends, or acting like sisters and the mother being young does happen in real life. But, I feel like this is always the go-to for television shows, and sometimes that’s just not the truth. I was raised by a single mother, and she didn’t have me as a teenager. In fact, she had me in her late thirties. I feel like the idea that single mothers can be at any age, and not just at a young age, is underrepresented in the media. I barely see a movie or a television show where the single parent and their kid have a huge age gap. It seems they always have to be about 15 to 20 years apart. Also, mothers and daughters are not always going to be best friends or act like sisters. Sometimes they can just act as what they truly are, and that’s being a parent and a child. That means sometimes they don’t see eye-to-eye, there are arguments, and there are conflicts. This is completely normal, but the media does not show that as often in these types of shows because sometimes people do not want to see reality; they want to escape and enjoy the story. It’s understandable, but it misrepresents the relationship of a single parent and their child, and overall the struggles that can come with the relationship.
Although Gilmore Girls and other shows similar to it do a good job representing this kind of duo from time to time, I believe there can be more variety and depth within this relationship that can be shown on television and the media. Especially since the world is progressing and times are changing, there are different people and relationships that should be more properly represented in the media.
Can’t get enough of HC UMass Amherst? Be sure to follow us on Instagram, listen to us on Spotify, like us on Facebook, and read our latest Tweets!