“Beauty is Pain”
A phrase often used to justify the pain we put our bodies and minds through in order to fit a mould that society tells us is “beautiful.” I feel like almost everyone reading this right now would have heard the saying at some point in their life. I personally have heard and said the phrase multiple times and have only come to realize how damaging and toxic it really is.
Women, from a young age, are told that enduring any type of pain in the name of beauty is normal and just the way it is. How many times have women sat in a salon, getting some part of their body waxed, and said the phrase while they winced in pain? How many times have women told themselves the phrase as they struggled to walk in those stiletto heels that have crammed their toes together? How many times have women said the phrase as they are sucking in their stomachs and putting on shapewear? How many times have women said the phrase as they were working out past their body’s limit? How many times have women said the phrase while they starved themselves in order to lose some weight? How many times have women said the phrase while they sat in the doctor’s office minutes before going under the knife to modify a part of their body? These are all things we have normalized as a society. Why is it that we glorify putting our bodies in uncomfortable and, most times, painful situations in order to fit a standard of beauty that most of us can never achieve?
These practices not only create a very toxic dynamic with our bodies, but also continue to perpetuate a certain standard of beauty. The “pain” in the phrase isn’t just physical, it is also very emotional. It is so psychologically damaging to keep thinking that inflicting pain, no matter how little it may be, on oneself is necessary in order to look beautiful. It is this mentality that leads women to eating disorders, body dysmorphia and unhealthy relationships with their bodies.
Now, I am not saying that you should ditch all of these practices, but we need to stop telling girls that these things make us “beautiful.” We need to stop glorifying these practices as something that we NEED to do in order to look pretty or fit a certain mold to be seen as desirable. If you feel most comfortable removing your body hair or wearing tight clothes, go ahead and do so, but make sure you are doing it for yourself and not to please someone else or society.
In my opinion, the phrase “beauty is pain” has got to go because beauty shouldn’t be painful. As cliche as it sounds, beauty comes in all shapes, sizes and forms. We should be empowering women to own and be comfortable with their skin, and celebrate their beauty since we are all unique. EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL IN YOUR OWN WAY!
