To get the boy, you have to be different. You have to dress differently, have a unique taste in music, be uninterested in what seems popular at the time, and detest the so-called “basic” girl. If not, your romantic future seems pretty bleak, or at least that’s what the media says. That “ideal” angsty teenager who’s different is what I thought I had to be all those adolescent years. Imagine how confusing that is: I’m trying to stay true to myself while also still consuming media that’s telling me to be some type of way. Luckily, we are now in an era in which people accept others for who they are and what they choose to identify with. However, we still perpetuate the same two scenarios that always play out as expected. Either this girl is mocked for what her personal interests are and the popular jock, who is seemingly deeper than we originally thought, realizes she is the one for him. Or the girl stands out to the brooding bad boy who’s new and they connect on a level in which others can’t understand. In one way or another, she always ends up being the main character who people root for and her likeability is determined by your ability to envision yourself as her. This constant repetition of forced personality traits breeds toxicity and is extremely harmful.Â
The main reason why I say this is because it reiterates that you have to be something that you’re not. It also encourages you to keep making valiant efforts towards this “ideal” girl and until you get it, you will never get the guy. As an adult, I now realize that this notion is a fabricated marketing ploy for audiences to enjoy. Representation in media is something that I wholeheartedly encourage, but the disapproval of hobbies due to their virality is another. Additionally, there’s probably a reason why so many people enjoy those things – it’s because they’re most likely fun. That is one adjective that is rarely associated with the grungy outcast. Her life starts to begin when she is noticed by her romantic interest, and they hit it off. Ladies and folks, that dependability creates this fictitious hierarchy and the only way that a girl like that can be stable is by being with the guy. As we now know, this is completely false and even though the character shows her strength in the end, it’s only because she has someone on her arm that she uses for security and support. The sad part about this commonly played trope is that we fall for it every time. I didn’t even realize that this idea was toxic until I had a conversation with my friends. It is so ingrained in the media that it seems as though this is the normal way to behave. The effortlessness in scenes can be attributed to the major camera crews present, scripts, and the directions that the actors had just received previously. So don’t worry if you like something others do too, cherish that and think of it as a way of connecting to others across the world.Â
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