Dating is intimidating. I’m neither the first nor the last person to voice this opinion. However, casually dating can be just as confusing and nerve-wracking as being in a new relationship. Don’t believe me? How many times have you thought you were being too clingy? Questioned why your new boy toy isn’t texting you? Realizing you’re jealous, but don’t want to look crazy, so you’re obsessing over how to handle it? Thought at least one of these things? That’s what I thought. Fear not collegiettes ™, because this week’s Campus Cutie will clear up the guy’s perspective on perplexing questions like these.
Major: Naval Architecture/Marine Engineering
Interests: Snow skiing, soccer, wakeboarding, guitar, and pretty much anything outdoors
Favorite Quote: “When nothing goes right, go left.” – Anonymous
Relationship Status: Single
Turn On: Outgoing personality
Turn Off: Cigarette smoking.
Is it abnormal for couples to talk every day (whether its texting, calling, in person, Skype, etc.) or is it abnormal for couples to go days at a time without speaking and why do you think this?
I don’t think its abnormal for couples to talk every day. People in relationships should want to talk to each other every day, or at least pretty often. It depends on the relationship, though. Skyping every day or getting angry when you don’t talk for a day is definitely a sign of clinginess. Not talking for several days at a time is definitely abnormal, though. That just shows that you aren’t genuinely interested in your partner.
What can a girl infer if she’s the one initiating contact or making plans constantly?
If the girl is constantly making plans and is seeing no sign of effort from the guy, then she should infer that he isn’t as into the relationship as he should be. It shows that he is just willing to “go with the flow,” when he should be involved in and excited about the relationship.
How often can couples hang out each week without appearing clingy?
Couples can hang out probably 3-4 times a week and not seem clingy. Even in relationships, people need personal space and time, and their partners should respect that. Many times people forget about the rest of their life, usually their friends, when they get into a relationship. There should be a balance between time with you partner and time on your own or with your friends.
How should people that are casually dating handle jealousy?
Jealousy happens to everyone, even if it’s just that tiny feeling in your stomach. If you are casually dating, then there is room for talking to and seeing other people. If you are jealous, that most likely means that you want to take the relationship to the next level, in which case you should talk to the other person and see if they fell the same way.
What about handling jealousy when you’re in a relationship?
When you are in a relationship, you still may feel jealousy. In this setting, though, you should have a trust with your partner that will ease your mind of all feelings of jealousy. If you don’t have that trust, then you need to work on that relationship or get out of it, because two people in a relationship should not have to worry about the other person talking to people of the opposite sex, unless of course if its for her safety and you are just concerned about the person that your partner is talking to.
What is your advice about dating in general?
Don’t force it. Relationships should come easy. That’s not to say that they don’t require work, though. If you find yourself struggling in a relationship or find that you aren’t connecting with someone, then he or she is not the right person for you.
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at U Mich chapter.