The concept of college is scary — leaving home, finding new friends, picking a major, balancing a social life while still keeping up with your academics — it’s all a lot to handle. When making the choice to attend Michigan as an out-of-state student, not only was I preoccupied with these worries, but I was also concerned about knowing absolutely no one here. While all my friends were choosing in state schools filled with familiar faces, I was stuck between the choice of starting fresh and breaking out of my comfort zone or staying comfortable and going somewhere I knew I would be comfortable from day one.
I am very proud of myself for choosing the scary option and breaking out of my comfort zone. Michigan was the clear option academically and, of course, in terms of college life. Like everyone says it’s a college experience like no other. However, when making my decision all I could think about was whether or not I would find friends like the ones I had at home.
Would it be worth leaving my best friends and starting fresh? What happens if I hate it? How long will it take me to build friendships like the ones I have at home? These questions filled my mind for months, even after I committed to Michigan.Â
Now that I have made it to my sophomore year and had the opportunity to build amazing friendships while also keeping up with my ones at home, there is no doubt I made the right decision. Here’s the truth: true friendships will last. The distance and the new life experiences apart from your old friends will not change what you have. People that are meant to be in your life will stay, and people that aren’t, won’t. It’s a hard pill to swallow, and I never expected to swallow it so many times. I have, unfortunately, had friendships I thought would last a lifetime die out because we didn’t stay in touch. But, I’ve learned that I am okay with that. I know, now, that some friendships are meant to stay in high school, in a closed chapter of your life. People grow up and distance themselves from one another for no reason other than growing up and starting new chapters.Â
There are some people that I hardly talk to when I am at school, but when I see them again at home, it’s like no time has passed. These are the friendships that are extremely important to me. We all have things to do and are very busy, especially when we live in different states for most of the year. The real test comes when we only have a limited amount of time at home and, realistically, cannot make time for everything we want to do and everyone we want to see. It’s those people who continue to make time for you and show up for you despite the time and distance apart. I love these kinds of friendships because no matter how long we go without talking, I know when I see them again, it will be exactly the same. I never doubt that when I need something, they will be there for me.Â
So my advice to you, whether it’s choosing a school away from all your friends, moving to a new city post-grad with all your friends, or trying to decide whether or not someone is a true friend: what is meant to be will be. Real friendships shouldn’t feel like an obligation or a daunting task. They should be fun and allow you to take your mind off all the stressful things in your life. Things change and the world keeps spinning, there is no use forcing a friendship you have grown out of. It is, of course, okay to miss that person and what you had. Nevertheless, no matter how much you miss someone, it cannot change the fact that you have changed and that friendship no longer serves you in the way it used to. Trust me, there are so many people you have yet to meet and so much love you have yet to share. When one friendship ends, it makes room for another even stronger one, one where you can grow together.Â
So, take the leap, leave your home, and create the life you have always dreamed of. The people who truly love you and who are meant to be in your life will be there no matter how far away you might be. College is the perfect opportunity to branch out and really find out who you are. I am so grateful for all of my friends from before college and would not trade any experience with them for the world. But, I also feel the same way about my new friends and cannot wait to live in our college town together for the next 2.5 years. Different doesn’t have to be scary; different can be fun, adventurous, and everything you have ever wanted.Â