I was recently told I was “entirely perfect” by someone I admire. While I was initially flattered (and I still am to be honest), my mind couldn’t help but associate that word with trouble. I could almost feel the ghost of my past lingering when I was heard that phrase. You’re probably wondering, what could be so bad about someone calling you perfect? However, I have learned that everyone has their own experiences that makes us perceive things differently. I, for one, have found that the word perfect has a negative connotation to it, and as perverse as it is, perfect is far from perfect. Perfectionism has a façade, and beneath it lies a threat to the nature of being human: imperfection.
Growing up, I was conditioned to be perfect. I had to have perfect grades. Speak perfectly. Look perfect. Act perfect. Be perfect. For a moment in time, I genuinely believed striving for perfection was in my best interest- that it would bring out my fullest potential and guarantee a bright future for me. However, in my process of attempting to be perfect, adverse effects occurred. I did awful things to my body to look perfect. I sacrificed a normal social life and my mental well-being to have perfect grades. I began to loathe myself. I couldn’t help but notice every little thing wrong with me and feel disgusted by it. I essentially destroyed myself to become something completely unattainable. So, when I heard the word perfect being tied to me, it lacerated me.
While I’ve outgrown this mindset, perfectionism still occasionally taints my thoughts. Here at the University of Michigan, it especially seems as though people are living perfect lives- obtaining amazing job offers upon graduation, interning at prestigious companies, having perfect grades and the perfect social life, and just looking perfect. When I first arrived here my freshman year, I remember feeling incredibly lonely and frustrated with my surroundings because everyone seemed to have everything together and I just didn’t. Instead, I’ve come to find that is not the case for anyone.
While this may seem so cliché and obvious, there quite literally is no perfect individual, and nobody is living the perfect life, even if it appears that way. Life inevitably comes with making mistakes and enduring hardships, and that is what makes it so wonderful. Being imperfect is what makes us human and it is incredibly beautiful. We make mistakes to learn from them and to have fun stories to tell. We should be recognizing and embracing our flaws instead of altering them. We should be taking up as much space as we need instead of shrinking ourselves to fit into places we don’t belong. We should live without the restraints of being perfect because being imperfect is perfect for us.