1. “I’m on my way”- Generally quickly sent as you’re throwing your last things together and trying to rush out the door. Or worse, while you haven’t even finished your makeup.
2. “Let’s Get Lunch”/Some Other Plan – While made with good intentions, the second you walk away from the 2 minute interaction you just had with an old friend whom you haven’t hung out with in a while (probably for good reasons, people grow apart) you immediately know that you will in fact not be getting lunch with your old tenth grade math classmate that you ran into at a party. Regardless, making plans because you can’t think of anything else to say is never a good idea. Don’t do it.
3. “I MISS YOU”- Related to the above, generally this preludes hastily making plans or promising to text someone that you really have no intention of ever seeing again, and frankly didn’t miss. In most cases, if you missed them, you would have made an effort to contact them before this point.
4. “I never saw your text!”- Sometimes I do see your text, and I just am too tired or busy to answer. But I’m just as guilty as you are of saying this instead of bothering to explain the real reason that I’m responding late to a text.
5. When you’re unable to hear what someone is saying, and you ask them several times to repeat themselves, and eventually still completely unable to hear, you nod and smile and pretend that you did in fact hear what they were slurring at you. We all do that. I would bet many things that there is not a single person that has not done this at least on a bi-monthly basis. People need to speak the heck up.
6. “I’ll go to the gym later/tomorrow”- I mean, unless you are one of those people who really has their life together and does fit the gym in on a daily/bi-daily basis, I’m pretty sure you are not in fact going to the gym. People who are planning on spending time at the gym do not desperately put off going to the gym. That’s why I’m writing this article instead of at the gym.
7. Along a similar note, if you have a lot of homework to do and it’s late the night before the deadline, and you’re so exhausted that you promise yourself that you’ll wake up SUPER early to finish said assignment, you won’t do that. You will at least sleep in half the time that you planned to spend on work, and end up both tired and scrambling.
8. “I’m sick”- I’m sure people lie about this for a variety of reasons, but on college campuses I would say it’s most commonly used when someone is simply too exhausted to go to something. Like after midterms, or binge drinking, whatever.
Picture Credits