Why Taking the Courage to Talk to a Crush Pays Off

Look, not everyone is savvy at romance or even talking to people at all. But modern technology can make it slightly easier. Yes, even though dating websites and apps can seem sketchy to some people (including me), there are many ways to meet and talk to people you like with a little help from modern technology—especially social media like Facebook or Instagram! Consider this little fairytale involving a slightly shy and awkward girl, a very attractive crush, and sliding into the DMs on Instagram.

I have a very horrible track record with crushes. Every time I have gotten the courage to get to know them better, it ended up with me being rejected. (One time, our classmates told him I liked him, and he rejected me on the night before my chemistry final. Very fun.) As a result, I have never really been attracted to a lot of people and instead have ignored my feelings through throwing myself completely into my friends, studies and extracurriculars. Sounds good to me, right? What is romantic love?

Well, they were right when they said “it’ll happen when you least expect it.” One day, my friend who went to school in a different country came over to visit, and showed me some pictures of her sorority on Facebook and Instagram. Cute, right? Well, when I saw several pictures, I noticed right away a person in the background who was honestly so attractive. Afterwards, I came back to the pictures and looked them up on their social media accounts.

Now, I wouldn’t say that I get attracted to a lot of people—like, it takes me a while to develop feelings for someone—but whoa. This particular person was really, really attractive. They were the type of person that I would love to have as a significant other. I did some lowkey creeping, and they were actually a graduate from a school I recently visited, and they were from Europe! I don’t know what it is about Europeans exactly, but they almost always end up being attractive.

Anyway, I knew that I wanted to talk with them. The only problem was that we both lived in countries that were very, VERY far apart, and well, we had never met in person before. Now, for me, it’s important that I get to meet anyone I would love to go out with beforehand because it would make me more comfortable and, well, it’s less sketchy and creepy. But this person was different. I realized that I might have developed a crush on a complete stranger in a different country. Ugh.

So it actually took me a few months of creeping their Instagram and not doing anything (okay, maybe occasionally looking at their stories) before I actually made a move. And that was good! It can feel very creepy if someone you don’t know immediately follows you and sends you a message.

By then, I realized that, hey, I’m graduating from university soon, I’m going to be 23 soon, and why not give things a shot? Who knows? Maybe if they didn’t end up liking me back, I would gain a new friend!

So I asked my best friend for advice on how to send the perfect direct message: cool, friendly and casual, yet not totally sketchy or creepy at all. Suddenly I realized: they went to the exactly same university that I was hoping to attend for graduate school! Why not ask them about their experience at that university? It’s totally foolproof, and it’s not even flirty or creepy at all! Perfect. So I wrote a short message, saying I happened to come across their profile and noticed that they went to the school I was curious about! And then my best friend had to hold my hand when I took a deep breath and sent the message. There, it was done. Now I had to wait and be as patient as possible. And pray that they would think that I was cool enough to get a reply.

After hitting send, I felt a sense of pride. I had gained the courage to send a message to someone who I really liked, and I should be proud for it.

Some time passed, and eventually I got caught up with schoolwork and other daily stuff. When it happened, it was out of nowhere. I was studying, and I got a message on Instagram. It was a reply from the crush!! I was so surprised and happy! From there, we started to have conversations about the school, while getting to know each other (with a bit of help from my best friend, who looked over every single reply from me). The person turned out to be completely sweet, kind and friendly, which I really admired. And then the miracle happened. They requested to follow me back on Instagram!! I was on cloud nine. All of the struggles in daily life as a student? That didn’t matter right now. I had gained some experience interacting with people I was attracted to.

So sadly this “like or love” story isn’t resolved and won’t be anytime soon, and I do not know if it will end up with being friends or more, but the point of this tale is that sometimes you just have to risk it and take a shot. Who knows? Anything can happen!

And it turns out that I’m pretty darn good at sliding into DMs.

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