Depression is not “one size fits all,” nor is it as straightforward as people like to make it out to be. There are a bunch of different types of depression which makes this mental illness hard to diagnose sometimes as well as just being a lot more complicated than people think. There are a lot of stigma and stereotypes around it, which is why for the longest time I was afraid to tell anyone that I suspected I was depressed. It’s a decision that I regret now, but at the time I just figured that I was overreacting over the breakup that I had just gone through and that I’d soon “get over it.” I was barely eating most days because I had no interest in food and I was skipping class because I just didn’t have the energy or motivation to get out of bed. Despite this, I still thought I was just making too much out of nothing and didn’t tell anybody about it.
The turning point in my attitude towards my mental health happened when I started waking up emotionally numb and having thoughts that the people I loved would be better off without me continuing to be a burden with how bad I was feeling. I talked to my sister about it and she’s really the one that convinced me to talk to my mom about seeking help for what I was feeling. I went to my doctor over spring break and was diagnosed with severe clinical depression caused by post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). My doctor then asked me if I was okay with taking medication and prescribed me Citalopram, the generic brand of Celexa, which she said she has the most success with for people like myself.
I’m currently taking half of the 10mg dose per my doctor’s instructions to see how I do on a lower dose. Within the first couple days of taking it, I felt a noticeable and positive difference in how I was feeling. I’ve been taking my antidepressants for about three weeks at this point and I have honestly never felt better. Going to the doctor for my depression was the best decision I could have made for myself and my only regret is having not gone sooner.
As I said before, depression is not “one size fits all” which means that treatments are also not “one size fits all.” Antidepressants working for me doesn’t guarantee that they’d work for someone else. There are so many resources here on UW’s campus such as the amazing Counseling Center, which is a great resource if you’re not really keen on the idea of taking medication or if you just feel that you need to talk out how you’re feeling. You just have to find what works for you.
If you are having thoughts of suicide/self-harm, please contact any of the following resources:
National Suicide Hotline: 1-800-273-8255
Casper Wyoming Behavioral Institute: Children, Adolescents, Adults Crisis Hotline: 1-800-457-9312
Worland Victims of Violence Center Crisis Line: (307) 347-4991
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