A viral TikTok video that set Hozier’s “Would That I” against an edit of Ruby, a character from Anne with an E, exclaiming the words “How I love being a woman!” set off a cascade. Women and girls from around the world made soft videos of women and girls taking bright, raw joy from an identity that has been used for so long to oppress them.
I, like many others, often find myself scrolling through the TikTok For You page as a distraction or procrastination method. I justify it by trying to contain the content I consume in this sort of media as positive and fulfilling. However, I wanted to translate this euphoric feeling into a healthier setting for myself, away from the rabbit hole of technology. This led me to incorporate affirmations and time alone into my bustling routine.
As we are entering into the bustling, stressful midterms season at Cal, I think this practice is more important than ever. It’s a time when we are vulnerable to hurt, susceptible to bad habits, and sometimes let our well-being fall a few notches on our priority list. These five affirming statements that follow are what I am incorporating into my own life to try and give confidence boosts to help me push through my first spring semester of college:
1. The Universe is Always Working Things Out For Me.
Social media users around the world have begun to swear by the tactic of saying “the universe is always working things out for me” or “everything always works out for me” twenty times in a row every day. Personally, I prefer the wider, universal idea. There will be, and have been, times in my life where a certain opportunity or want does not pan out, and the idea that the universe is always working things out for me helps me recenter my hopes for the future. “Okay, so I got rejected from this club. What can I now pursue instead?” instead of frustration over the fact that I said everything always works out for me, and in fact, every little thing did not.
2. I don’t chase, I attract.
Especially in a love life context, this affirmation, one of the most popular ones, aims to lessen the amount of space being taken up in your brain over how to make someone like you (or how to achieve a certain thing). Let the opportunities and wealth come to you.
3. I am beautiful. I am worthy. I am unique.
When I was first entering puberty, this is an exercise my mom introduced to me–the action of looking at yourself in the mirror and affirming your beauty and worth. In an era where diet culture and body shaming are so common, this couldn’t be a more important exercise for people across all demographics. I find it especially helpful when I feel like my outfit is weird, or I’m having a bad hair day, or even frustrated over homework. Sometimes all we need is a compliment to prompt a confidence boost, but we often forget that compliments can come from ourselves too.
(P.S.–if you haven’t heard it in a while [or even if you have], you are beautiful! You are worthy! You are unique!)
4. Everything will come to me in time.
Similar to the first affirmation on my list, this statement is meant to ease anxiety around not being in control or not achieving things fast enough. Sometimes all you need is time, and while time is precious, you shouldn’t be afraid to give yourself grace with it as well. There’s no need to overexert and stretch yourself thin.
5. How I Love Being a Woman.
Of course, I had to include my favorite quote turned edit turned affirmation. Saying these words not only reminds me of the pure, joyful side of humanity and one of my favorite fictional worlds, but also grounds me in my identity, femininity, and how I express the two. My female ancestors suffered through restrictions on how they could express themselves, but I have the ability to do so freely. There are many turmoils that come with being a woman, but I choose to remind myself of the sisterhood and love it brings.
Whether you try these statements in your own life or use your own affirming practices to practice self-care, I hope you can take little moments of peace in your day to re-center. It’s always okay to put yourself and your well-being above everything else.