Long Distance is Hard

    College is a totally brand new experience, and the transition into a new life is something that is continuous as we all struggle to find who we’re going to become.  You’re spending time away from the people that know how you work, and know how you respond to outside circumstances.  This brand new life is going to change you in ways that you never would have thought to have been possible, and those people that knew you before may have to learn the ways you have changed when your lives mesh again in the future.  College begins with a series of long distance relationships.  

Often times we find that those we are closest to, in our families, and in our friend groups miss us more deeply than we would ever have imagined.  It’s easier to realize how important another person’s presence is in our life when they have become absent, and this also makes us realize how much easier it is to be around people who have learned to enjoy your quirks, and can pick up on the behavior which shows that you are off.

For me, I am no stranger to long distance relationships, I have friends spread around the world from the programs I was involved in before Berkeley, and it’s these kinds of friendships which have lasted over the phone and continue to thrive that have proven to me that proximity doesn’t always need to be a factor when choosing who you are closest to.  Luckily I have found people in college who I know will become these kinds of friends when our careers after Berkeley take us all over the country, and maybe even the world.

    However, it is difficult.  It is hard to have friends who you have no real possibility of seeing unless you really plan months in advance and work out all moving parts of your visit.  It is difficult to want to visit with people whose lives are scattered and are moving full speed ahead across the country from yours.  It’s even more difficult when your life is moving full speed ahead with no breaks as you’re also defining yourself in the place where you are in life apart from these people who are only a phone call away.  

    It’s painful to want to be there for your friends, and want to make memories with them when you know that as of right now, and indefinitely it seems, those are only real possibilities of the far off future.  I won’t be able to see plenty of people who are so important to me until we have already defined ourselves in college, and potentially in the real adult world.  But, there is no question as to whether or not maintaining these relationships is worth it, when you find people who make your day feel a little lighter, even if the only communication you have is over a phone screen.  

    It’s also helped me to learn that I can handle other forms of long distance relationships, even romantically(which is something that I have been opposed to before).  But when you find people who inspire you daily, and help you to grow into a better person then you should hold onto them, no matter the distance.  Because distance doesn’t matter as much when you’ve found people who make your individual world a better place to be, and thankfully my people have found ways to brighten my day every step of the way(those who are far, and those who are near).