SOLO DATES I TOOK MYSELF ON

One thing I’ve had to learn these past two years was to enjoy my own company. As we grow up, the time we spend with ourselves becomes increasingly important and something we need to get used to. It definitely gets lonely, even when you are enjoying your own company. But there’s beauty in loneliness when you choose to embrace it. Here are three of the most challenging, but memorable, solo dates I took myself on.

1. Going to the movies. 

This is probably one of the first things I did by myself a few years ago. It was awkward, and it didn’t help that the movie was kind of boring too. I even ended up leaving the movie early because I was falling asleep since I was so bored. That’s something I might stay doing with friends and family. Even though the outcome wasn’t something amazing, or romantic, it was definitely worth trying in the end. 

2. Going to a cute, Instagram-worthy cafe. 

This to me was one of the more intimidating dates I went on alone. These are usually spots you go with your friends, or significant other to take cute pictures at and post on social media. I thought I was relatively independent and could take on a challenge like this, with no problem. I was… very overwhelmed and intimidated by the groups of people there enjoying themselves. I somehow pulled through, got myself a cutely decorated slice of cake and a strawberry smoothie with a pink-shaped straw, and sat myself down by the window. There wasn’t much for me to do, to be honest, but I decided to journal and process my thoughts on what it was like constantly being alone. 

3. A solo concert. 

This was bold, even for me. Probably also the most memorable. As a person who generally went to concerts with friends, I decided to go to one on my own for the first time. I mean, I’m a 20-something-year-old, living in Southern California where all the best concerts happen. A perfect opportunity to go alone came up and there I went on an hour-and-a-half drive to Los Angeles by myself to go to my first solo concert. Funny enough, I was able to meet another person who also happened to go to the concert alone in the seat right next to me. We got to talk about our favorite songs, what we’re studying in school, and where we go. Who would’ve thought? Though the thought was scary, I fully enjoyed my own company and got to meet someone similar to me. 

All three were at different points in the last two years but all made lasting impressions on me and the relationship I have with myself. I get to learn what I do and don’t like, and where I find my time, money, and attention most valuable. Now, that translates into how I spend my time with the important people in my life in ways it didn’t before when I was so caught up in going out, making sure I was always with people where I didn’t have much say in what we did. There’s value in being alone and learning about yourself.

• alone time
• being alone
• self-care
• self-love
• solo dates