I hope everyone appreciated the title’s slight sarcasm. There is no such thing as a “perfect text,” sent or received. Texting can be one of the most imperfect forms of communication that we so desperately depend on in these college years. It all started in high school with the latest gossip flying through Razr phones. Who hasn’t heard of the story of the poor girl’s ruined reputation often involving a camera phone and every boy in your high school?
One of the main concerns with this devilish yet oh-so necessary form of communication is between you and your latest guy. You don’t care what you send your best girlfriends in a text. When you text your friends it usually has to do with a coffee date to catch up on each other’s lives, but when it comes to boys it seems that even the most beautiful, confident girl becomes frozen in her tracks, or bee-lines it straight to her best friends room, eyes glued to an illuminated cell phone screen, usually uttering something like, “He texted me, what do I say back?”
This is a much too common experience that you or your close friends have all shared. After the immediate fear and spastic rough formulation of your next text, you have to stop and ask yourself, “What am I DOING?”
Let’s face it; no one is completely above this phenomenon and this anxiety usually arises in the earliest stages of meeting a new guy. The story goes something like this: you had a great night out, you gave your number to this guy you flirted with, and you left him guessing and wanting more. At the time you felt in control and on top of the world (or of South Side Berkeley, for that matter). Then maybe the next day or so you get a text from him, written like something you would expect from a 12 year old failing out of English class, but it freaks you out regardless. “Hey wats up,” is probably the best you’ll be challenged with, or better yet the all too open ended “Hey.” Now, you find yourself at a loss for words (also known as poorly typed fragment sentences).
This sudden text anxiety all stems from the fear of losing a guy’s interest. You don’t want to fall on either end of the psycho girl spectrum: uninterested and stuck up or clingy. Both types of girls aren’t worth it for a guy and for good reason. But guys aren’t usually faced with extremes; maybe their high school ex-girlfriend, but certainly not you. You want to reply sounding interested, but not over eager at the same time. You also don’t want to reply with the same apparent apathy as he brought to the table.
Yes, I know the thought processes. And you aren’t just worried what to say but when to say it! Do I text back right away, wait a few hours, or a day and tell him I was doing something super interesting and important? Long gone are the days of a man calling you three days after he gets your number and asking you out on another date. Believe me though, if texting was around back then, don’t think that guys wouldn’t be using and abusing just like today. Guys are scared and cautious too, that’s why they text like they do. So please try to keep that in mind while in the midst of your mini panic attacks.
So here is my advice:
- Don’t over think the text. Think about a time when you had him or someone else wrapped around your finger (in a good way). What did you feel like and how were you communicating? It’s hard to find that spark while texting, but you can still hold on to your sassy self.
- If the conversation is dry and awkward, ask when you’ll see him next. You are NOT a scary maneater if you choose to do this. Ask it in a way that makes him set something up or simply when and where he will be out on the weekend and that you would love to see him there.
- Another thing to keep in mind is that friends are always great for advice, but don’t get caught up in the multiple different opinions from a room full of girls trying their best to play their perfect game.
- DON’T drunk text. As tempting as it may be after the confidence boost given to you from alcohol, a late night text sprinkled with grammatical errors and typos will ensure that your guy will never take you seriously as a potential relationshp partner.
- Speaking of game, guys (try) to play, too. If it seems like he’s uninterested or lofty, he might also be sitting with his friends asking what he should say to keep you on your toes.
So the moral of the story is, don’t stress out so much. You probably have a paper due tomorrow that needs more attention than this guy that’s trying to ‘holler.’ This is an obvious over generalization and should be a bit funny. But, if you remember one thing the next time you are staring at a text for a little too long, just remember to relax and picture him right in front of you. I doubt you would stare with fear into his eyes.
Image Source:
http://www.datingish.com/705200894/he-was-texting-a-girl-late-at-night/