This last year I have been busy finishing my undergraduate degree, lots of work, and applying for graduate school. I received my first denial this last Wednesday and it was a little bittersweet. With so much uncertainty and transitioning for schools next year, I felt a little relieved since I had one last place to figure out where to live and with who. However, I wasn’t always accepting right away.
Receiving rejection letters, to me, is kind of like handling grief. There’s so many stages that will come along with it. For my rejection letter, they cut to the chase and let me know in the subject-line what I was dealing with. When I saw it though, I was still taken aback. I went through feeling shocked, having the “I knew it” moment, and acceptance all at once.
I think the main thing I learned from this is this could be a sign. Maybe I wasn’t meant to go to this particular school or not meant to go at this exact moment. Afterwards, I was sort of relieved because I was able to finish some things I have been procrastinating on getting to.
Later that night, I also made sure to do something I like. So, I put on Netflix and journaled. If you’re like me and applying to grad school, denials are something normal and something you can never truly prepare yourself for. I still have three other schools luckily, but in the meantime I won’t stress myself out wondering too much about them.
I know I’ll go to graduate school someday and somehow, but even if it weren’t to happen right after I finish undergrad, I know it isn’t an end all, be all situation.
Now I know if I were to get another rejection letter that I should take a break from things instead of overworking to distract myself. That’s one of the biggest ways I try to cope with my feelings, but it isn’t the best way to do so.
Until I hear back from my other schools, I’ll just keep my fingers crossed and if not, then I’ll move on.