The opinions in this article are those of the author and do not reflect the views of Her Campus.
This post is mainly for anyone who thinks that it is okay to demean someone for posting about their mental health on social media. I’ve seen this happen to people I care about at an alarming rate over the years, and I feel like it is time to talk about it – especially because it is UC Davis’ Mental Health Awareness Month this May.
Do me a favor: the next time a supposed “friend” of yours makes a social media post about their not-so-great mental health, don’t take it out on them by insulting and invalidating them through the act of commenting or messaging words that are full of pure malice. You either a) don’t know how to help or b) don’t care to help. How exactly is it their fault that you cannot do anything? How exactly is it okay to demean them when they are not harming anyone or expressing a wish to harm anyone? Are they attacking a population of human beings by talking about themselves? Are they furthering the oppression of or justifying the damage done toward anyone when they speak of their own pain?
So you don’t want to see “negative stuff” when you go on a social media site? Congrats! You have the privilege to avoid it, and to not deal with the tough reality of other people’s lives. Utilize the ability to unfriend, unfollow, or block someone. No one will notice and condemn you for being unable to help. You are the only one who really has to deal with your decision to look away.
If you are severely triggered, that’s another story; please protect yourself. If you are, however, very simply annoyed by people who express their mental health concerns, don’t plague people with your unnecessary comments on social media (or outside of it as well) that clearly display your insensitivity and your total lack of empathy.
Many people use language to comfort and empower them. If you are trying to silence those who DO NOT seek to oppress you or harm perceptions of anyone else’s identity or your identity, you are toxic. You are part of the reason why there is so much stigma surrounding mental illness.
Reevaluate why these posts provoke you enough to make such horrible comments. Work out your own insecurities. Get yourself educated if you are so inclined. Practicing pure kindness and consideration for others, researching topics related to mental illness, and having an open mind is what this education is about. If you can type out a hateful comment on someone else’s post, you can definitely use your favorite search engine.
I am not endorsing the idea that it is okay to ignore the sufferings of others. I am merely asking you to stop deciding that you get to police what people say about their own struggles when they express their suffering on social media.
I know this does not happen solely within the realm of social media, but time and time again social media continues to be a place where a human being can hide behind a screen, insult another human being, and then get away with it while feeling powerful. When your idea of power involves taking away someone else’s power to speak, you are not doing it right.
If you are feeling as if my use of second person is a personal attack on you, you might be guilty of trying to stifle other people’s emotional expression. I hope the people you really, truly care about receive acknowledgement, support, and compassion. Stop being part of the problem.
Let’s reinvent a cliché phrase: if you can’t say anything on social media that shows your support for people with mental illness, don’t say anything at all. Don’t pretend to acknowledge, care, or support someone if you honestly feel like you cannot. I guarantee no one wants your insincerity.