In the world of dating, we all think we know the type of person that we like to be with. When someone asks, “What is your type?” that’s who we describe. To you, your type doesn’t usually change, and it’s something you know like the back of your hand.
Everyone has a type of person they’re attracted to, whether it’s on a broad spectrum or it’s super specific. It’s just natural for people to know and understand who they think would be the ideal person for them.
Over the past few months and over long talks with my girlfriends, I have come up with a theory about the “type” of people we find attractive. My theory is that you have the type of people you find extremely attractive — the ones you deem your “type” — and then you have the type of people you actually date.
I’m not a scientist or a researcher. I’m simply a college student trying to figure out the world of love and dating.
It’s true, physical attraction is how we form the majority of our first judgments about a person. But my theory holds true for so many people simply because there is more to liking a person than their physical appearance. We know the types of personality traits we look for in a partner, but still have expectations — or rather, hopes — for their looks as well.
So, why do we keep trying to date people that we don’t deem to be our “type”? Visual attractiveness only goes so far. When do our minds understand there is more to a person than physical attraction and switch to looking for the people that are actually good for us?
Perhaps, the first person you date or have a serious crush on is the one that sets up your “type” for the rest of your life. They are the partner-type you always go back to in the end because they were the centerpiece of all your “firsts” — especially if they were good to you in the relationship.
Why get caught up in a type? Try to have an open mind!
Stop saying “Oh, they’re not my type,” and focus on the person’s genuine kindness, morals and beliefs. For me, a guy that has good morals, respects women and treats you like a princess is more attractive any day over a cocky good-looking guy.
Cover image source: Pexels, Scott Webb