Since the very beginning, or maybe just the beginning, of Patti Stanger’s Millionaire Matchmaker television show, males and females have been intricately crafting and constructing their perfect mate. Funny, attractive, smart and ambitious; the list can go on forever. Now, I’ll be the first one to admit how awesome it would be to have the option to eat at my neighborhood “Make-Your-Own-Boyfriend” Bar and Grill, where for $4.99 I could pick and choose exactly what I want my on my perfectly hand-crafted boyfriend. But that’s not really feasible…unfortunately.
So, since we can’t have our cake and eat it too (gosh I’m awesome with these puns), I surveyed about 20 college kids to figure out what exactly the deal breakers are in starting up a relationship with your special someone. Here are your top 5.
1) Surprisingly, the vast majority said that “cigarette smoking” was the biggest turn off. Stank breath ain’t cute. I didn’t even know people do that anymore. You would think with the mass amounts of “tobacco free” commercials, people would get the memo. Guess we can’t all be that intelligent.
Ah, perfect seg-way into deal breaker numero dos.
2) “I hate stupid people. If you aren’t intelligent, I’m not interested.” I can definitely agree with that one there. It’s the worst when you feel like you’re conversing with a brick wall. If your daily conversations with your significant other include giving inanimate objects personality traits, the weather forecast, or Chuck Norris, ya better hit the road jack. And don’t cha’ come back until you’ve enrolled in your local community college.
3) Amazingly, the third most significant deal breaker is whether he/she is a liar. Ironically, while I was writing this article, the new MTV show Catfish was airing in the background. If you haven’t been able to catch an episode yet, it’s basically about regular people hoping to find love on the Internet, but when they finally meet the person behind the computer screen, the majority of the time, it’s been a cluster of lies. I just don’t get it. I guess I just assumed this was a given.
4) “I can’t stand to be with someone who is discreetly disgusting.” In other words, bad hygiene is a no-go. Regardless of being clean, the shower is my personal think tank. My problem solving skills are always top notch when the water is running. I understand the whole “save water, shower with a friend” fad, but that isn’t synonymous with “save water, shower on Tuesdays because you don’t have a friend to shower with.”
5) Last but not least, maintaining strong family ties can be very important to your partner. The problem here lies when you’re dealing with a momma’s boy. The kind that still calls her 21-year-old son to make sure he’s taken his Vitamin C supplement for the day, because during their morning phone call he sounded “a little sniffly.” Back off momma bear, time to let your cub put on his big boy undies and take the world by storm.
I know these 5 must-haves may not be your personal provisions, but it’s imperative that you evaluate your 5 deal breakers prior to engaging in a romantic relationship. So the next time you think you might have met the man of your dreams, make sure he’s crossed all your T’s and dotted your 5’s.