I’ve always thought that time heals, but that’s just a fib. If anything, the fourteenth has only gotten harder for me over the years. I think it’s because I was in denial six years ago and never truly came to terms with this terrible reality: on Wednesday, Feb. 14, 2018, my local high school encountered a deadly, horrific massacre which resulted in the death of 17 people.
As the years pass, every February I am filled with sleepless nights and anxiety. We will never be the people we were before the fourteenth. Every time a door slams shut I catch myself flinching before I remind myself that it’s nothing but a door. The vigils, marches and funerals stay imprinted in my memory— constantly reminding myself how quick someone can be taken from you.
I’m surrounded by hearts, balloons, roses and chocolates which most people view as signs of love, but to me they’re just fearful reminders of the day I almost lost my sister, my best friend. Symbols of love that people would consider beautiful are mere flashbacks to the horrendous day. Others would typically see roses and their delicate petals as pretty, while I am reminded of how quickly and easily it can become a token for the person who was stolen from you.
The 17 victims had futures and were gone way too soon. They were smart, innocent individuals who deserved better. Alyssa Alhadeff wanted to be a lawyer and professional soccer player. Nicholas Dworet was committed to the University of Indianapolis for competitive swimming. Carmen Schentrup was classified as one of the 53 National Merit Scholarship Program semifinalists in the country. Peter Wang was last seen holding the door open for his classmates to escape the massacre, putting everyone else before himself and died a true hero. That’s just to name a few of the victim’s plans before they were ripped away from them.
“Jaime will be forever 14, but it was not supposed to be that way,” Jaime’s father Fred Guttenberg said in court. “I couldn’t wait to teach her drive. I couldn’t wait to throw her a Sweet 16 party. I couldn’t wait to see her have her first boyfriend, and yes, I had my dad speech all worked out for whoever that boy was gonna be. I couldn’t wait to see her graduate. I couldn’t wait to see her achieve her dream of getting into the University of Florida and rooming with her cousin and living her best life. I couldn’t wait to see her graduate and ultimately become a pediatric physical therapist, working her dream job.” All the aspirations these 17 lives will never be able to accomplish, their parents denied the opportunity of seeing them live out their dreams.
Please take a second this Valentine’s Day to remember the 17 precious souls we lost. There are little things you can do everyday leading up to the fourteenth to honor the victims. For Alyssa, you can participate in outdoor activities; for Scott Beigel, you can go for a run; for Luke Hoyer, you can shoot some hoop; or working out for Meadow Pollack. To finish off your workout, get yourself a smoothie for Alex Schachter. If you have more energy, express yourself by dancing for Jaime Guttenberg, or paint for Gina Montalto while listening to some tunes for Joaquin Oliver. If it’s a rainy day and you’re stuck indoors, read a book you’ve been wanting to read for Helena Ramsey or play some video games for Peter. Then, sit back for a good movie by watching “Star Wars” for Martin Duque Anguiano or “Beauty and the Beast” for Cara Loughran. During the movie, you can snack on some Oreos for Nicholas or peanut M&M’s for Chris Hixon. Once the weather is all cleared up, wear your favorite purple outfit with pride for Alaina Petty while you shop for some new shoes for Carmen. At the store, compliment a stranger for Aaron Feis.
While you are celebrating this Valentine’s Day with your loved ones, take a moment to appreciate what you have. Think of the 17 people that are gone. What if it was your parent, child, sibling, or best friend? You would want them to be honored and remembered too.
SAY THEIR NAMES!
Alyssa Alhadef, 14
Scott Beigel, 35
Martin Duque Anguiano, 14
Nicholas Dworet, 17
Aaron Feis, 37
Jaime Guttenberg, 14
Christopher Hixon, 49
Luke Hoyer, 15
Cara Loughran, 14
Gina Montalto, 14
Joaquin Oliver, 17
Alaina Petty, 14
Meadow Pollack, 18
Helena Ramsay, 17
Alexander Schatchter, 14
Carmen Schentrup, 16
Peter Wang, 15