Let’s be honest: keeping up with New Year’s resolutions is no easy feat to accomplish. If you’re like me, you surely set a couple of resolutions to kick off 2023. And, if you’re even more like me, then you’ve quickly abandoned a majority of those goals. Because no one makes resolutions to keep them… right?
I only discovered a few years ago that most New Year’s resolutions are literally made with the actual intention of keeping them only for the first month or just a few days. In other words, you’re basically setting yourself up for failure if resolutions are approached as these unattainable, terrifying tasks. To name a few: be in bed by 9 p.m., go to the gym daily, refine your diet, cut off that toxic ex for good, etc.
If you are able to complete these things, then I’m endlessly proud of you. But if you’re like me, then these rarely work out.
For years, I tried to cut sugar from my diet, and always fell back into a cycle of cookie-munching and brownie-buying routine. I tried to be in bed by 9 p.m., and— you guessed it— would fall asleep by 2 a.m. At the beginning of the next year, I’d look back on all of my failed resolutions before repeating the exact ones. Willingly, I consistently made myself feel like a disappointment.
Two years ago, I finally realized the cycle I had trapped myself in. People don’t wait to change their lives in years. My toxic relationship with the modern-day New Year’s resolution needed to end.
That year, I set no resolutions for myself. I let myself live freely: I ate what I wanted to and slept at whichever time I chose. When New Year’s Eve rolled around, instead of reflecting on everything I wasn’t able to accomplish, I wrote down a list of everything I had managed to do.
And the list was long with things like cutting my hair, traveling for summer vacation, and starting a new job. I made money, spent money, visited family, and declared my major again for the third time. Sure, I ate horribly some days, but there were also days when I ate brown rice and overnight oats!
At the very end of the list, I make sure to put the simplest accomplishment yet: I lived.
The way we perceive our lives changes the way we live them, and I think that we often get so caught up with goals that we forget to look back on everything we’ve already succeeded in. The ending and beginning of each year is a triumph that we should celebrate, not feel a sense of dread or defeat over.
This New Year’s Eve was my third time making the list, and I’ve felt infinitely better about my life focusing on my accomplishments rather than toxic wishful thinking. The New Year has just started, and I know that I can’t wait to tackle 2023.