If you put a gun to my head and told me to write a love letter to my bed, I would tell you to give me a double shot of espresso and a full 90-page notebook.
My relationship with my bed is comparable to that of an ex that you just can’t stay away from; You think about them every time you’re apart and you just can’t stay away. I’m boy-crazy, yes, but I am even more bed crazy at that. Let me tell you, like all exes get, my relationship with my bed became extremely toxic. I was overstaying my welcome to the point where life was passing me by. The symptoms? I was always drowsy and letting my mental health deplete as I lay on my own crumbs instead of living.
The worst part, though, was that as much as I wanted to be productive and in my “that girl” era, I couldn’t bring myself to get up (like ever). Thankfully, I blocked my ex and similarly cut off my bed and traded it for a life that was actually fulfilling.
Here’s my guide on how to quit bed rotting, even if it seems impossible.
it starts with your mindset, of course
When your bed becomes your best friend, you probably find yourself neglecting your actual friends (guilty as charged).
I stopped going out, said “no” any time anyone tried to make plans with me, and fully quit all of the hobbies that used to make me happy. All of a sudden, I was just too tired to do anything.
Here’s what I realized, though. I hate to go all “YOLO” on you, but our youth is so temporary and I think we forget to conceptualize that sometimes. One day we’re going to be old and at that, we will be too old to do all the things we have the opportunity to do now. We won’t always be able to dance with strangers at the bar or even in our dorms with our roommates. We won’t be able to run, go to a yoga class, or jump out of bed with excitement for the day.
I’ll do you one better. Being old and raggedy is so far from our present that it doesn’t seem all too daunting, but what is in our near future is graduating.
Maybe it’s my senioritis talking (she says hello, btw), but something more near and dear to our future is throwing our caps in the air.
We won’t be little college girls forever, and as exciting as that is, it also has birthed the most motivation I’ve ever had to stop bed rotting. I began truly romanticizing the beauty that comes with being a college girl. I get to go to Takeover Tuesdays, Wine Down Wednesdays, College Night Thursdays, and Sunday Fundays and it’s socially acceptable. One day, all the day drinking and weekday outings will seem irresponsible, and that is short of alcoholism.
We will not always be college girls who live with our best friends and can bust in their room for the 90th time just to look at them and tell them about what our situationship said (again). One day, our favorite people will not live in a five-mile radius, but instead be scattered across the world, busy with their jobs and families and dare I say: their new friends. We will not live in college town forever and it has become extremely motivating to look at this fact as a motivation to get out of bed and spend time with the people that won’t be here forever.
When you talk about “the college days” with your kids and they ask you what it was like, you’re going to want to tell them about all the days in which you lived, not that you laid in bed scrolling on TikTok for four years straight.
The moral of the story, give yourself FOMO. Remind yourself that none of this life is forever. While you can, push yourself to go to the yoga class, dance, see your friends, romanticize the mundane idea that your body can move, and remember that the present is all you have.
building a life of escapism
I can blame my bed rotting on one factor in particular: My bed was my comfort. I went as far as to say that laying in my nest felt like the hug that I often needed. Bed rotting while rotting my brain on hours of TikTok felt like my escape from all the things I was stressed about. My bed was my escapism.
That’s a problem in itself if I’ve ever seen one; I had a life that I needed to escape from.
When I was consuming these endless hours of TikTok, I was often watching vlogs and Day in My Life (DIML) videos of girls who had what I perceived to be better, more fun lives.
Ask yourself this: What does my dream day look like?
I bet when you think about it, it can be pretty obtainable.
Instead of watching these influencers get ready to go out or have a day of going to pilates classes or exploring the city, make it a goal to do those things yourself. Even if it’s baby steps, make one fun day for yourself a week. Start planning activities for yourself that will actually make you excited to get up. This can be as little as teaching yourself a new hobby that you’ve always wanted to try, doing your makeup, or exploring campus.
I realized how obtainable a fun life for me is in college. I live in Orlando and I go to UCF. It’s so easy for me to sign up for a cycling class like I’ve always dreamed of trying, attending a comedy show, a cooking class or even trying a new coffee shop downtown.
Make your life something that you are happy with that you don’t need to escape from. Trust me with this one.
Accountability is key & it’s easier than you think
I can’t tell you how many times I told myself “Maybe tomorrow” when it came to my last step of committing to doing fun things. Rumor has it, that I’m not always enough to keep myself accountable, but I did find two ways that are easy and actually work wonders.
First off, initiate plans with your friends. I’ve recently found myself texting my friends and asking them to go to the gym with me later in the week or even just hanging out. Not only will this help you rebuild your neglected friendships, but it’s a lot harder to choose the bed when you’ve already made plans and now you’re not only bailing on yourself but someone else.
I’ll admit it, sometimes the day comes around and I so badly want to cancel plans and stay in solitude. However, knowing someone is not only excited to hang out with me, but planning their day around our plans always ensures that I go. And contrary to my dread of going, I never regret it once I’m there. Sometimes it takes doing something fun or being with someone you love to remember how much joy there is waiting for you outside of the doors of your room.
My second accountability tactic is your sign to start being in your influencer era like you’ve always wanted to. I said it earlier, but I love DIML videos to my core.
If you’re like me, take the jump and start making videos yourself. When I started doing this, I found myself being more productive for the camera (call me a fraud, but it works).
By now, I’ve equipped you with everything that took my life from one that looked like wasting away, to a life that is full of actual happiness. Let me be the testimonial that now I prefer to be up and at ’em, filling my planner with festivities and being on the town rather than in my bed.
Goodbye, bed rotting, hello beautiful life.