Yes, this is an article about feet. Or, maybe, it’s more.
As I sit in my bed every night, carefully massaging my foot and applying balm to my ankle, I cannot help but become aware of the teeny, tiny dramatic bone that decided to make its presence known to me earlier this quarter by sneakily chipping off. By comically rolling my ankle while walking home during week one, I started my third year of college with triple the amount of disaster than what usually accompanies my clumsiest moments: torn ligaments, an injured tendon, and my first broken bone. After almost ten weeks of “waddling” in a boot and ankle brace, I think it is safe to say that the recovery has been a jumble of inconveniences, gratitude, frustration, and growth. And with another two to three months of physiotherapy ahead of me, I think that it might be time to focus on the less apparent ways this injury has transformed my life, perhaps for the better.
Forced to wear a boot for six weeks and unable to exercise my full range of motion, my ambitious plans for junior year were completely overhauled. I was mostly limited to my house unless I took an Uber to campus, and everyday chores such as grocery runs became challenges. Doctor’s appointments for X-rays, follow-ups, and physiotherapy for my ankle replaced the hours I intended for hobbies and little adventures such as hiking or going out with friends. Amid constant hindrance, being a little bitter about the situation is typical, and I was resentful for quite some time. The pace of my busy, chaotic life drastically slowed down, and adjusting to it was uncomfortable. However, this deceleration has pushed me to grow and create spaces for myself to pause and observe as I go about my day, and I do quite appreciate that.
Right off the bat, the injury forced me to incorporate physical care into my daily routine, from physiotherapy exercises twice daily to icing my foot and massaging it every night. Despite being initially slightly annoyed, I noticed myself liking this simple habit of caring for my feet, which often get overlooked at the end of a long day of bearing my body weight. Not only was I increasingly perceptive of the sensations in my body, but I was also actively engaging with it in a manner that allowed it to heal and recover from physical exhaustion. I should have paid more attention to this aspect of self-care in the past, when most of my efforts were dedicated to mental rejuvenation. The broken foot and sprained ankle have made me consciously grateful for all that the different parts of my body do for me. Now, I cannot imagine my day without incorporating little acts of care for my body as a part of my morning or nighttime routine.
When I could step outside the house and return to classes and some activities, I was still in a boot, significantly increasing my walking time as I “waddled” everywhere. I couldn’t scroll through Instagram or text while walking like I used to; I needed to concentrate on the ground and avoid further injury. My English professor this quarter had previously encouraged us to look at the trees around campus, along with the advice to wear comfortable shoes (which I definitely wasn’t following the night I broke my foot). I could now see what all the fuss was about; our campus is gorgeous, especially when painted in the hues of fall! I appreciated being outdoors even more after being previously confined indoors. Observing nature unhurriedly when walking to class or resting under a tree in the afternoon to soak up the sun quickly became one of my favorite parts of a day spent on campus.
Altogether, the change of pace from the injury pushed me towards a more contemplative mindset. The moments when I take care of my foot are now accompanied by reflections on how I store stress in my body following the day’s happenings. I have never been more present than I am now; just going about my day, I regularly check in with how my body feels. So, while I can’t say that I am grateful for my broken foot because I definitely do not hope to break any more bones in the future, I do think there is a way for me to break even with the negative impact of this injury by appreciating the subtler wins. Navigating the recovery with patience and fluidity has allowed me to connect with my body and the world more completely, and I am learning to savor these moments of both rest and movement.