As I’m sure you’ve all previously heard, meeting and keeping up with new friends after college is much harder than meeting friends on campus. Gone will be the days of your floor-mates stumbling into your room for a spare hairdryer, or you meeting some of your best friends through a GE group project. As hard as it is to imagine losing touch with these friends, it may seem inevitable as people move on through different parts of post-college life. Luckily, there are ways to regularly stay connected to your closest friends even without the luxury of seeing them on campus every day. Let’s find out what you can do to kindle and foster your college relationships before graduating:
- Find a fun ritual activity to do
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Image source: Florens Debora from Giphy Are Wednesday wine nights reserved for you and your besties? Can you still continue where you left off in D&D over Zoom? Maintaining rituals that you share with your close-knit friends can help you resume your friendship where you left off after graduating! What’s also great about this is that it gives you and your besties something to do to feel connected even if people don’t feel like talking about their day. It’s a great way to lower the barrier and expectations with keeping in touch with friends and can really help you facilitate the closeness you guys once had without necessarily being physically present with each other. Give it a try!
- write some snail mail in your free time
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Image source: Ali Mac from Giphy Another thing I personally did over COVID was to write snail mail to some of my high school and freshman year friends, something I feel is just so underrated. And the great thing is, you can be as creative or not as you like. Though snail mail takes time to deliver, it’s another great activity to partake in, particularly if you and your friends are across big time zones that make it difficult to virtually connect on a regular basis. It’s also just so nice to receive something tailor-made for you in the mail. I know it sounds a bit cheesy, but I promise you the recipient of your mail will appreciate the gesture a lot!
- Be there when they need you, whenever you can
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Image Source: Filmeditor from Giphy As we all get busy with our lives, checking in on friends becomes as difficult as it is important. Sometimes, after long periods of no contact, even sending a text message and checking in on them might feel a bit awkward. I still encourage you to do it, for two main reasons:
1) Even if your friend is not going through a hard time, it’ll help them feel appreciated and open up a door for more opportunities together.
2) Sometimes just one “well-being” message is enough to help someone out of a rough time.
Being the bigger person and checking in can be a great way to lower the barrier of connection of “out of touch” friends; if nothing else it’ll give you a clear conscience.
Though the friendship landscape post-grad might look a lot different from when you were on campus, there are still some great ways to keep in touch with your friends even after you all leave. I think the fact that you meet your best friends in college is highly romanticized in movies and society, despite the reality that life-long friends are made through commitment and connection beyond your college years too. As you navigate through the plethora of emotions after graduating, I hope you find strength in the fact that this may be a new beginning for many of your friendships beyond the UCLA campus.