As I sit down to begin this article at 3:30 AM, I am reminded why I so desperately need to write it.
Note To Self: Sleep More.
American psychologist Abraham Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs visually demonstrates which necessities must be satisfied before an individual can attend to those higher up. At the bottom, physiological needs: air, water, food, shelter, sleep, clothing, reproduction. At the top, self-actualization: desire to become the most that one can be.
To me, the interesting thing about this hierarchy is that I so often use those higher up to justify my lack of basic self-care. My desire to be “the most [I] can be” drives my lack of sleep more than anything else. The need to excel in my classes, extracurriculars, personal life and so on fuels my unconscious desire to push my body further than is healthy.
Is it a product of my upbringing? Capitalism? Hustle culture? Too much social media? While I am by no means a psychologist, my guess is that a little bit of everything in my life has led up to this moment at, now, 3:42 AM.Â
However, my determined self-actualizing always leads to prolonged migraines in lectures, sleeping through alarms and the perpetual thought of “why can’t I do this?” that follows me around campus like the Celsius that always finds its way back into my hand.
Why can’t I do this?
The answer of self-care is so plainly in front of me and yet my brain too often refuses to acknowledge it. The words stop flowing at 3:50 AM or maybe they had already stopped at 12 AM or last night when I decided to watch one more episode. So, I am writing this as a Note To Self: Sleep More. Because if I have survived years of final exams, uphill climbs to campus, three hour long lectures, then I can force myself into bed an extra hour or two early.
They say that tasks shift to take up the time you give yourself. So, who’s to say sleeping more will make me less productive. In fact, every single scientific sounding TikTok I’ve seen has said the exact opposite. I have survived much worse than the risk of not completing an assignment on time or missing that one party.
So, now, it is 4:00 AM. I have class at 10:00 AM. Soon, the sun will be rising and the students will crowd outside my window as they make their way to class and I might be anywhere; anywhere but awake. Goodnight!