Breasts. No matter the size, no matter the shape, we all have them, and have to keep them strapped in somehow. And we’ve all had questions or heard rumors about our knockers or their restraints that we may be too embarrassed to voice. Lucky for you, a thorough investigation has taken place to provide answers to some boob FAQ’s, so you no longer have to wonder.
1. Does wearing a bra to bed increase the risk of breast cancer?
Short Answer: No.
Explanation: Lots of research has gone into this question, and most of the panic initially resulted from a book published about fifteen years ago called Dressed to Kill. It claimed that bras constrict lymph nodes and trap in toxins that increase a person’s risk of cancer. It’s understandable why this would scare women; there are a lot of scientific sounding words in that theory, and that makes it sound legit. However, no scientific studies were actually conducted to prove this statement, and scientists disregard it as so ridiculous it’s not even worth doing one. Enough evidence already exists to show that lymphatic system constriction does nothing to increase breast cancer risks. So, while wearing a bra to bed might wear out your bra a bit over time, your titties themselves are safe from harm.
2. Would wearing a bra to bed makes boobs perkier?
Short Answer: No.
Explanation: Your push-up bra may make you look a little more voluptuous in your PJ’s…until you take it off. Sorry ladies, but once you release your bosom from its captor, it will shoot right back down to where it wants to be.
3. Do you need to wear a sports bra while exercising?
Short Answer: Yes.
Explanation: It will not be harmful to your health not to wear a sports bra while exercising, but it could possibly cause stretching of breast skin and tissue to be jostled around so freely, and it would probably be uncomfortable or painful depending on the form of exercise taking place. Also, who wants to get their nice bras all sweaty? Ew. My sports bra recommendation: Champion brand from Target.
4. Can you work out your boobs?
Short Answer: No.
Explanation: You can strengthen and build your pectoral muscles, which might boost your boobs up, but breasts themselves have no muscle in them.
5. What are boobs made of?
Short Answer: Squishy stuff
Explanation: Breasts are composed of 15 to 25 milk glands, along with fatty tissue and fibrous connective tissues. Since breasts are mostly fat, the only way to naturally increase the size of them is to gain weight in fat. Unfortunately, if this is your goal, there is no guarantee that your boobs will be the only center of fat storage.
6. Do sports bras give you backne?
Short Answer: No.
Explanation: The bras themselves don’t cause those notorious back breakouts—sweat does. The salt and oils get trapped in a steamy vat of brewing breakout stew unless you attack them with a loofah soon after your workout. As long as your post-workout wash is effective, you should be safe from an awkward backne episode. Try Neutrogena Body Clear Pink Grapefruit body wash from CVS.
7. Does your breast size have any relation to your mom’s?
Short Answer: Possibly.
Explanation: You actually have an equal chance of inheriting breast genes from your mother’s side of the family and your father’s.
8. Why do guys have nipples?
Short Answer: Why not?
Explanation: Nipples, while a useful reproductive body part for mothers, are simply vestigial, or leftover, parts in men. They have not hindered male humans throughout the course of history, so their curious presence has endured. During the first several weeks of gestation, embryos are neither male nor female, and nipples develop before the gender distinction is made. So you could argue that for the first few weeks of every man’s life, he was a girl. But that might just hurt his feelings.
Titillating Trivia
- 80% of women wear the wrong bra size
- Most women’s left breasts are bigger than their right ones
- The average breast contains 4-5% of the body’s total fat
- The biggest bra size currently available for sale is KK (20-inch cup size)
- Victoria’s Secret was named after Queen Victoria
- A university in Hong Kong offers a degree in Bra Studies
- Breasts have been found to sag in response to tension or sadness