The biggest misconception about therapy is that you need to be in a crisis to get help. I’m here to say that the best time to get help is actually when you think you need it the least.
As someone with an anxiety disorder, I have been in therapy since before my diagnosis and have always been a major supporter of anyone I know trying it out. I always appreciate having a chance to talk to someone about whatever is going on in my life, whether it is a big argument with a friend or accidentally burning my bagel in the toaster.
However, my therapy journey hasn’t always been easy. There were times when I felt anxious about going to my sessions, worried that I would not have anything to say or that we might talk about something I wasn’t ready to talk about. I had even stopped responding to my therapist for a few months, feeling absolutely overwhelmed by just the thought of texting her back. This makes sense, because mental health is not a linear process by any means; there are times when you feel like you have figured everything out, and others when you feel like you can’t even begin to solve what has been going on. If this resonates with you, I just want to say that I know how it feels, but I’d like you to hear me out.
At a point in my life where I felt like everything was under control, I finally started seeing a therapist again. I wasn’t sure if this was the right decision, because I worried that my life was going “too well” to have therapy be productive and worth the time. However, once I started going back to therapy, I knew this was going to be the chance to develop a really strong relationship between my therapist and I. What I had been missing before, was an opportunity to build up trust between us, which would make me so much more comfortable sharing whatever was on my mind, and relying on her when life got tough.
The first few sessions were not what I was expecting. The narrative around therapy is that you always jump right into the darkest points of your life or discuss your childhood memories and relationship with your family. It was not like that for me at all. We talked about my life, but we also did mindfulness exercises and talked about other things like my schoolwork and hobbies. I felt so much more comfortable after these sessions, knowing that she would never expect me to talk about anything I was not ready for, and knowing that I could rely on her for support when I needed it.
Of course life does get hard, but having someone outside of your normal social network to depend on for support and advice can make all the difference in feeling like you’re not alone. My advice to anyone reading this, is to think about giving therapy a shot, because it doesn’t have to be something you are nervous about or feel like an unnecessary task. There are so many amazing therapists out there with different styles of therapy and different personalities, and sometimes it’s just about finding the one you feel comfortable with. It can make a huge difference to know that you can always talk to someone about anything you need, from the big things to the burnt bagels.