It did not end with a bang, but with a whisper– undramatic, quiet and bittersweet. There was no drama, no fight, no anger and no regret. It was agreed that the relationship was just not worth the commitment because someone became doubtful. You felt it coming. You started to doubt, you started to worry, you started to think of things to save the relationship but in the end, you started considering other options. It took a lot of courage, but someone eventually said — “Let’s break up.” But what does it mean now? Do you continue being friends? Though it may seem like a good idea at first, it will only become a race—a race to see who moves on first. If you were really in love, then staying just friends is nearly impossible. Watching your ex slowly fall in love with another the same way they looked at you a few months before, is bitterly painful, especially if you have not moved on. You end up never receiving the closure you need to continue, and end up stubbornly wedging your foot between the door that is trying so hard to close.
Then, what is considered “good terms”? Breaking up on good terms normally means that both parties agree that they would be better off continuing their life without that romantic commitment to one another. That is the definition we would like to believe is true. But the reality is that breaking up on good terms takes action. It is the ability to take time off each other and really consider moving onto something even better. Breaking up on good terms means that you acknowledge the parting as a good memory. Breaking up on good terms is wishing your partner the best of their future endeavors. Breaking up on good terms does not always have to be refreshing or happy. Breaking up on good terms is just bittersweet and it should be.
You will shed tears and you will feel a bit empty, but then it only takes time before you start to realize that sweet aftertaste of starting anew. Take all the time you need, but it has to be away from your ex. You know you wanted the breakup too. Remember those reasons and remember why you even considered breaking up in the first place. To do that effectively, you need a clear conscience. Everyone gets hurt in a break up, even if you are the one that did it. It took courage and a lot of reason to gather enough strength to say the words. It took a lot of trying and a lot of convincing yourself to come to the conclusion that the relationship was doomed to fail. Nothing went wrong, and no one saw it coming, which is probably why it did.
So the answer to the question “is there such a thing as breaking up on good terms?” is yes, if you allow it to be.
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