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Almost four years ago, I moved away from home to attend UCSB. Home was in Los Angeles – about a three-hour drive from Santa Barbara. It’s not far at all, but this was my first experience being away from home for an extended amount of time. To me, it felt like I was on the other side of the world. This might be the case for a number of college students no matter how close they are to home.
No one tells you how much you’ll miss your family nor how often. That aching pain you feel in your chest after waving your family goodbye on move-in weekend may not be as painful as a breakup, but it comes pretty damn close. They tell you they’ll call everyday, but you realize it’s not the same. Racing your older sibling to the bathroom in the morning becomes a thing of the past. You won’t wake up to the smell of coffee beans roasting in the kitchen while the news becomes background noise to morning conversations with your parents. Instead, you’ll wake up to heavy footsteps pounding the carpeted floors of your dorm’s hallway followed by a murmur of unfamiliar voices.
No one tells you it’s all on you. Mom and dad are miles away. No one is there to hold your hand. You are responsible for YOU, for your wellbeing and for your actions. If you skip class, it’s on you. If you don’t study for a test, it’s on you. From the first day in your new “home,” you have to become completely independent over night. It can feel overwhelming at times, but it’s sink or swim. Though, by the end of it all you’ll find that you’re not even swimming anymore, you’re floating!
Because no one tells you how much you’ll grow. No one tells you every day brings new opportunities and you’re stronger than any obstacles you face. No one tells you how hard it is to lose friendships you thought would last a lifetime, but they also don’t tell you the friendships that do survive are the ones worth keeping. Your college experience will test you, but you’ll learn to not let your failures define you—choosing instead, to let your successes speak for themselves. No one tells you moving away for college is easy, but I’m telling you, it’s worth it.