1. “You’re from Chicago? OMG isn’t that super dangerous?”
Um, no? Contrary to what Donald Trump says, not all of Chicago is a gang zone, guys.
2. “I don’t care what you guys say. Its name is the Willis Tower.”
Okay, so maybe Sears doesn’t own the building anymore, but to be honest, I have never heard a Chicagoan call the Sears Tower the Willis Tower. Or, if they do, they immediately correct themselves.
3. “Okay, but the weather isn’t that bad.”
DUDE. IT WAS SNOWING IN APRIL. THAT IS FAR TOO LONG FOR A CHICAGO WINTER. I DO NOT WANT TO PUT A CHAIR OUT IN THE MIDDLE OF SPRING.
4. “Hey, let’s go hang out at Navy Pier!”
I mean, the Children’s Museum is pretty cool, but you don’t have kids yet, so really what is the point of going?
5. “This pizza sucks!”
Well one, don’t get it from Uno’s, like if you’re going to go for a chain, you should have gone for Giordano’s or Lou Malnati’s. Two, don’t get deep dish next time? We do have party-style pizza here.
6. “Can I get ketchup on this hot dog?”
Plain hot dog? Go ahead. Chicago style hot dog? Lol no.
7. “We should go check out Lake Shore Drive!”
I…I kinda like having all of my limbs, thank you.
8. “The Cubs won! Let’s go to Wrigleyville!”
See above, but this time it’s less about losing my limbs and more about staying alive, you know?
9. “Michael Jordan was overrated.”
Excuse you, have you ever seen Space Jam?
10. “New York/Los Angeles is better.”
Way to ignore Chicago’s history, guys.