When you think of self-care, you might imagine this scenario; after a long day, you unwind with a specially made bubble bath and you’ve been debating on which bath bomb you want to use for a minute now. You decide on Cheer Up Buttercup from Lush (which I highly recommend). You’re enjoying yourself until you return to reality. Turns out, the tweets you read about self-care and how you should take that bubble bath after a long day at work isn’t realistic at all.
Self-care isn’t necessarily only something you earn after an exhausting day. It’s a lifestyle. It shouldn’t feel like something you have to do, rather it’s something that you should do. Everyone has exhausting days at work or school.. For almost everyone, this is an everyday thing. This is why we should encourage the idea of taking care of ourselves, not only physically, but mentally and emotionally as well. For some, that may include the end-of-the-day bubble bath, but that shouldn’t be the one activity that defines self-care.
“Don’t be afraid to say ‘I’m busy today,’ even though you’re not” – Andrea Savage
During my first year of college, I felt that pressure to do something every weekend with my friends. It was hard to say no because of that fear of being left out. This resulted in financial stress because I kept throwing cash around. I realized how irresponsible I was with my money and just choices in general. It was also very time consuming and draining. I just recently realized that staying in (and saving that $$$) was okay. I eventually balanced going out and staying in, giving me time to not only enjoy myself but to also recharge mentally and emotionally from an exhausting week.
Making time for yourself should never be a burden. It also shouldn’t be such a hard thing coming up with an excuse as to why you can’t make a motive, there’s no reason to lie when you can’t show up to something. The simplicity of saying “I’m busy” or “I’m not in the mood to go out tonight” is no big problem.
Self-care isn’t always fun
Sometimes taking time for yourself means you need to cut things that affect you in your everyday life. This can include food intakes like too much caffeine, stopping binge online shopping (please.. your bank account will thank you) and learning how to financially save and budget your money. A majority of these things are to help you in your daily life, to keep you on track to a better you. I know for me, I helped myself stop doing the things that were hurting me or stressing me out. I lacked financial stability (shopping…) and/or my diet was going downhill. When I tried fixing these, I considered it self-care at the end of the day mainly because I’m taking care of myself physically and mentally as well.
Learn to love yourself
Seriously though, you should definitely learn to love yourself. It’s very essential in the self-care routine, but easier said than done. You need to learn to bond with yourself, be your own best friend. Learn about your insecurities, open up to yourself and be willing to feel the pain and take control of your feelings. Once you’re able to do this and you’re able to feel comfortable with your own feelings, you then can really know yourself and be able to move toward your own feelings and not away from them. Now this doesn’t mean you shouldn’t keep things bottled up inside, always make sure to be comfortable enough to talk to someone you trust about your feelings and your inner thoughts.
You are stronger than you think you are, beautiful as well. You are creative, smart, generous, and me telling you all of this doesn’t do much but it does wonders coming out of your own mouth. Take some time for yourself and genuinely tell yourself, “I’m THAT B****” until you truly feel that you are indeed that top notch gal (or guy).
At the end of the day…
Now, I’m not saying you shouldn’t have that fancy bubble bath at the end of a long shift. You should just learn that there’s a huge difference between treating yourself and taking care of yourself, a majority of these “self-care tips” cater towards more to treating yourself side and not taking care of yourself and, girl, we really need to take care of ourselves in this evil world we live in.